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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Cooking with the Caylor's Story & Reflection
A few years back, I had just returned from a rewarding conference in Napa put on by Harvard School of Public Health and the Culinary Institute of America (CIA) - Healthy Kitchens, Healthy Lives. Healthy nutrition science meets taste 💜. The first year my husband and I attended, I came home energiz...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 adaptation assumptions boundaries burnout communication delegation expectations gratitude hospitality humility insight leadership partnership preparation realism resilience resources support systems teamwork
Forced Pause Story and Reflection
My leisurely start to morning clinic with a no-show was short-lived. The kind, new MA took longer than experienced MAs to room patients, which began stacking up. I had almost caught up when I walked in to see another patient. Based on the CC, I was fairly sure this would be my opportunity to "get...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 acceptance burnout prevention cocreation compassion connection control disruption empathy frustration grace listening mindfulness pause perspective presence reflection reframe repair resilience systems
Suffering Story and Reflection
We were only a little over 2 hours into our hike, and my feet were killing me. It was my first backpacking trip through Crow Pass. We had knocked out 3 of the 23 miles and 2000 ft elevation gain after work Friday afternoon. We set up camp by Crystal Lake. I was so uncomfortable that I wondered if...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 aging assumptions awareness compassion confidence endurance fitness growth humor innercritic insight mindset misattribution narrative perspective reflection reframing resilience self-doubt self-talk suffering
Worst Case, Story and Reflection
Early on, as a new physician coach, one of my first group sessions was in a Zoom breakout room with residents during their grand rounds. The main room topic, presented by another physician coach, a surgeon, was Unhealthy Perfectionism, briefly mentioning how our thoughts affect our emotions and a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 assumptions avoidance awareness coaching curiosity empathy engagement grace insight intent interpretation mindset patience perception presence projection reflection silence uncertainty vulnerability
The Spectacle Reflection
Back when my youngest daughter was on the high school track team, I sat in stands cheering her team on. I was watching the guys race the 1600 meters. The front two were neck and neck on the last curve. Suddenly one collapsed. You know those times when you are thankful for a timely article or lect...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 accpetance awareness courage embarrassment emotion empathy grace growth humanity humor perspective presence processing recovery reflection resilience response support survival vulnerability
What's Possible Reflection
My husband has an affinity for renovation. He's talked me into 3 major renovations over 3 decades. He's the visionary. I used to be overwhelmed walking into places and immediately discount them as hopeless. But, he would say, "It has good bones," and "I can see it in my mind." I learned to believ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 belief brainstorm brainstorming collaborate collaboration creativity flexibility growth innovation mindset obstacles optimism patience persistence perspective possibility renovation resourceful resourcefulness solutions strategy support vision
Accomplishing the Mission Reflection
Last June, the Titan submersive caught the attention of the world. When he described the Naval Submarine Priorities in all situations, Rear Admiral John Mauger caught my attention when he said: "Number 1 is Safety, Number 2 is maybe something along the lines of avoiding counter detection, Number ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 09, 2025 altruism boundaries intervention leadership mission overextension perspective prevention priorities proactvity recovery reflection resilience rest risk safety self-awareness sustainability warning-signs wellness
Stress Reflection
This week, I invite you to look at a particular stressor you are currently facing, just faced, or anticipate facing. At first glance, how is it a threat? When you look through this lens of what's at risk? Notice how that feels. For me, I notice an increased intensity in my heartbeat and a little ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 08, 2025 adaptability agency awareness breath challenge clarity empowerment mindset neurobiology presence problem-solving reframe regulation resilience resources response shift stress threat
Story Reflection
This past week, I listened to a webinar featuring Dr. Paul Chelminski from UNC - Chapel Hill (and my former faculty advisor in the CHARM GME Wellbeing Course). He stated that much of our discontent in medicine comes from taking too much refuge in the idealized version of medicine. (My interpretat...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 08, 2025 acceptance advocacy agency aspiration boundaries compassion connection discontent gratitude grounding idealism inspiration mindset perspective presence purpose realignment reality reflefction satisfaction
Edit Reflection
When we lived in Florida, we had a lab mix named Snickers. True to his breed, he loved to be right next to his people. While we were temporarily in a rental house, he had to stay outside, and he became an escape artist. One day driving home from work, I saw him happily trotting on the side of the...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 08, 2025 acceptance adaptability bias compassion connection forgiveness grace growth humor identity interpretation learning lightness mistakes ownership perspective redemption reframing rescue storytelling
The In-Between Reflection
A story with three invitations for you to reflect. A few months ago, a friend asked if I would consider a small part-time role that seemed exciting in some respects and daunting in others. (Plus, the potential to be distracting even). I quickly did the reflex thing that I rarely do - I said, "Of ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 08, 2025 alignment balance boundaries calling centering clarity commitment decision discernment integrity mentorship peace priorities process purpose reflection service surrender waiting wisdom
Giving Reflection
This week, in the spirit of giving - I invite you to consider who you might gift a unique gift to. The gift of extending positive intent is powerful. I once coached a resident who felt a particular attending "had it out for him." He reviewed the evidence. I asked if there was any other way to see...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 08, 2025 awareness burnout coaching cognitive reframing compassion emotional intelligence empathy gratitude growth insight intent leadership medicine mindset perspective perspective shift positive intent reflection reframing relationships resilience suffering teaching wellness
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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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