Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Memorial Day weekend was the best weather we've had in Anchorage in quite some time. My friend, Kari, a lifelong Alaskan, asked if I wanted to hike Bird Ridge which starts at the Bird Creek parking lot, a popular moderate to difficult 5-mile 3400 ft elevation hike. I've never done it, although mo...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assumptions attentiveness automaticity awareness clarity confirmation bias correction curiosity expectation humor identity insight interpretation language listening mindset miscommunication mistake narrative observation overconfidence perception preparation presence readiness realization reflection reframing storytelling

The "Right" Tool, Story and Reflection

My husband and I enjoy our annual camping trips across South Central Alaska (Hope being a favorite). We upgraded a couple years ago from the pop-up tent to a trailer. (Yep - we are 'that age' 😉) But we have learned over the years the importance of taking a screen shelter with us - whether for bug...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assumptions brainstorming coaching creativity curiosity discomfort empowerment experimentation exploration flexibility imagination improvisation innovation insight limitations mental agility metaphor mindset obstacles options perseverance perspective problem solving reframing resilience resourcefulness self-efficacy tools workaround

Running Up Mountains Story and Reflection

Have you ever been isolated during a race? Me neither, until I was. I participated in a small fundraiser weeknight race after work in late May several years back. It was my first (and last) mountain race. It was a race up "Peak 3" in the Alaska Chugach Range, with the finish line at the top, smal...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 accomplishment comparison compassion disappointment disorientation empathy exhaustion expectations experience fear fear response frustration growth humility identity isolation journey mentorship metaphor mindset normalization overwhelm parallel perseverance reflection resilience self-compassion transition uncertainty vulnerability

The Tale of Two Challenges

Challenge #1 The Hike. When my kids were both back in Alaska, they insisted that we climb the frontside of Flattop one rainy day. It's a popular local hike. It's my least favorite because I loathe the "scramble" at the top, where you create your own rock climbing path up. It's not particularly st...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptability agency automatic thoughts challenge control discomfort emotions experience fear flexibility frustration growth humor memory making mindset narrative negativity ownership perspective reactivity reflection reframing resilience responsibility self-awareness self-compasssion self-talk storytelling thoughts transformation

Great Progress Reflection

What's in a subject line? Specifically an email subject line. No, this isn't a reflection on best email practices. Just the power of words. You know how we often keep a dialog going via email by replying to the original one sent, creating a chain of emails? Well, these past couple of weeks, I hav...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 awareness communication correspondence digital dialogue email emotion energy experiment framing impact influence intention interaction language messaging mindfulness mood naming narrative perception priming reflection resonance response subject line tone tone setting word choice

"The Plank" Story and Reflection

Most Sunday mornings during the pandemic, I logged on to a zoom call to do strength training with a group of women physicians led by Dr. Ali Novitsky (photo above) or her team of coaches. She combined mindset work with bodywork. On particular workout stands out to me. She told us we were finishin...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability all-or-nothing binary thinking bodywork capacity challenge choice coaching discipline discomfort effort endurance flexibility growth incremental progress learning mental flexibility mindset mindset shift motivation perseverance persistence physicality reflection reframing resilience self-awareness self-compassion strength training surprise

Envy or Esteem Reflection

They're everywhere. Physicians who own their own thriving practices. Physicians who lead departments and hospital systems. Physicians who lead well-being initiatives in effective, meaningful ways within their systems. Physician coaches who work clinically full-time. Physicians who have retired a...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance admiration agency appreciation aspiration authenticity celebration choices comparison confidence discontent envy esteem fulfillment highlight reel identity inspiration journey joy mindset priorities purpose reflection self-doubt self-worth shift strenghts uniqueness values

Costly Lunch Laughs, Story and Reflection

Back in 2003, I was with four friends in Germany. We ducked into a diner for lunch. The two guys were just hilarious. Their dry sense of humor and perfect timing had us laughing so hard we could barely catch our breaths - literally for my friend Cheryl. 😳 She inhaled food upon laughing, and then ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 action adrenaline amygdala bravery compassion courage decision making discomfort doubt fear freeze response growth hesitation humor inner conflict instinct intuition knowing leadership ownership paradox presene pressure reaction reflection rescue responsibility self-trust urgency vulnerability

Anniversaries and Analogies Reflection

Just prior to marrying the man in this photo (throwback to big hair 😂), his dad handed us an article torn out of a magazine. It used comparative imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage. The takeaway gist in my young mind was 1. Don't be shocked by the rapids, which are a natura...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptation celebration challenge change curiosity emotions endurance evolution forewarning growth imposter syndrome journey marriage metaphor mindset navigation partnership perspective phases preparation reflection relationships resilience self-doubt support transformation transition uncertainty whitewater

What's Missing Reflection

You know those times when two clothing items randomly end up next to each other in the laundry, and you see a new outfit? No, just me? Well, anyway, I had a similar thing happen as three situations juxtaposed together to open up my thinking. The first one involved a couple of group sessions in w...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 automatic thoughts awareness bias circumstance clarity coaching confidence distortion empowerment evidence facts filtering insight internal dialogue juxtaposition mindset minset shift narrative perception positivity reflection reframing self-perception self-talk self-worth storylines thought distortions truth telling validation value

Laughs and Confidence, Story and Reflection

I was recently discussing confidence in the lecture setting with a few faculty physicians, and it brought up some memories. One of the first didactics I taught as a new faculty member was 9 years out of residency. (Actual photo around that time of me as new faculty, 2007-2008 above.) I was presen...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability authenticity confidence connection courage credibility didactic education expertise growth mindset humility humor identity imperfection imposter-phenomenon insecurity learning mentorship partnership presence presentation reflection relatability resilience self-acceptance support teaching teamwork transparency vulnerability

Navigation Story and Reflection

Years ago, my young nephew was carpooling to school with us in my new Honda Odyssey minivan that had my first navigation system. From the captain chair behind me, he exclaimed, "Oh COOL Aunt Tonya! You have a force field?!" It took me a minute to realize he was talking about my dashboard location...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 amygdala analogy boundaries calm childhood control countertransference curiosity detachment emotions empathy forcefield humor imagination inner-peace mindset narrative navigation perspective protection reaction reflection reframe regulation resilience road-rage self-awareness triggers understanding visualization wonder

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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