Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

As many of you know, my husband loves to cook and is quite good at it. I had learned to make only two meals before marriage (I avoided the kitchen despite my mom's pleading). But I was suddenly eager to impress my husband with my expanding culinary feats. In those early days of wedding bliss, the...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 communication connection courage creativity culinary diappointment encouragement experimentation feedback fixed mindset growth honesty humility humor improvement intention kindness learning openness perseverance practice reflection relationship resilience self-awareness skill building trust vulnerability

Rumble of Renovation, Story and Reflection

I know I talk a lot about renovation - that's because I have spent no less than 19 years living in three different houses undergoing renovation by my husband - who has a day job! Plus, the experiences are so rich with lessons! So I want to take you back a few years. But first - Brene’ Brown defin...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability authenticity burnout collaboration communication compromise conflict resolution courage creativity curiosity emotional intelligence growth mindset healthcare impasse ingenuity innovation leadership listening mutual respect partnership perspective problem-solving reconstruction redesign renovation resilience rumble sustainability systems change teamwork vulnerability

Seat Swapping Story and Reflection

During our 30th anniversary trip, we explored new locales and discovered fantastic small restaurants that locals were trying hard to keep off TripAdvisor. One such gem was in Mainz, a cozy outdoor setting with beautiful ivy over the brick walls and around the fencing. If you have ever eaten out w...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assessment attention awareness boundaries comfort communication composure decision making empathy experience foresight humor improvisation instinct intuition judgment observation partnership perspective predictability protection relationships restraint risk scenario-reading self-knowledge travel trust uncertainty

The Youngest Flower Girl: Story and Reflection

I'm not sure every parent of a flower girl fears how the ceremony will go, but my husband and I sure did years ago. You see, our oldest was invited to be the flower girl for 2 of our med school classmates when she was barely three years old. We had many voices of experience say she's too young. A...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 balance big picture celebration ceremony detail-orientation embarrassment feedback focus humanity humor hyperfocus joy learning memory mindfulness mistake negativity bias overfocus parenting perfectionism perspective presence reflection regulation self-awareness self-compassion social cues storytelling worry zooming-out

Hurricanes and Turtles, Story and well...

Our brains are pretty entertaining places - especially in the middle of the night - mine offers me random memories seemingly out of nowhere for no reason. Last night I remembered chasing down a turtle during Hurricane Ivan in 2004 in Pensacola, FL. My husband was operating. The girls and I were h...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 animals chaos connection curiosity disaster empathy fear heroism humanity humor imagination impulsivity instincts learning memory middle of the night midnight thoughts nature nostalgia parenting perspective playfulness randomness reflection resilience spontaneity storytelling surprise unplanned unpredictability

"Alaskan Tough" Story and Reflection

Memorial Day weekend was the best weather we've had in Anchorage in quite some time. My friend, Kari, a lifelong Alaskan, asked if I wanted to hike Bird Ridge which starts at the Bird Creek parking lot, a popular moderate to difficult 5-mile 3400 ft elevation hike. I've never done it, although mo...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assumptions attentiveness automaticity awareness clarity confirmation bias correction curiosity expectation humor identity insight interpretation language listening mindset miscommunication mistake narrative observation overconfidence perception preparation presence readiness realization reflection reframing storytelling

The "Right" Tool, Story and Reflection

My husband and I enjoy our annual camping trips across South Central Alaska (Hope being a favorite). We upgraded a couple years ago from the pop-up tent to a trailer. (Yep - we are 'that age' 😉) But we have learned over the years the importance of taking a screen shelter with us - whether for bug...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assumptions brainstorming coaching creativity curiosity discomfort empowerment experimentation exploration flexibility imagination improvisation innovation insight limitations mental agility metaphor mindset obstacles options perseverance perspective problem solving reframing resilience resourcefulness self-efficacy tools workaround

Running Up Mountains Story and Reflection

Have you ever been isolated during a race? Me neither, until I was. I participated in a small fundraiser weeknight race after work in late May several years back. It was my first (and last) mountain race. It was a race up "Peak 3" in the Alaska Chugach Range, with the finish line at the top, smal...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 accomplishment comparison compassion disappointment disorientation empathy exhaustion expectations experience fear fear response frustration growth humility identity isolation journey mentorship metaphor mindset normalization overwhelm parallel perseverance reflection resilience self-compassion transition uncertainty vulnerability

The Tale of Two Challenges

Challenge #1 The Hike. When my kids were both back in Alaska, they insisted that we climb the frontside of Flattop one rainy day. It's a popular local hike. It's my least favorite because I loathe the "scramble" at the top, where you create your own rock climbing path up. It's not particularly st...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptability agency automatic thoughts challenge control discomfort emotions experience fear flexibility frustration growth humor memory making mindset narrative negativity ownership perspective reactivity reflection reframing resilience responsibility self-awareness self-compasssion self-talk storytelling thoughts transformation

Great Progress Reflection

What's in a subject line? Specifically an email subject line. No, this isn't a reflection on best email practices. Just the power of words. You know how we often keep a dialog going via email by replying to the original one sent, creating a chain of emails? Well, these past couple of weeks, I hav...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 awareness communication correspondence digital dialogue email emotion energy experiment framing impact influence intention interaction language messaging mindfulness mood naming narrative perception priming reflection resonance response subject line tone tone setting word choice

"The Plank" Story and Reflection

Most Sunday mornings during the pandemic, I logged on to a zoom call to do strength training with a group of women physicians led by Dr. Ali Novitsky (photo above) or her team of coaches. She combined mindset work with bodywork. On particular workout stands out to me. She told us we were finishin...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability all-or-nothing binary thinking bodywork capacity challenge choice coaching discipline discomfort effort endurance flexibility growth incremental progress learning mental flexibility mindset mindset shift motivation perseverance persistence physicality reflection reframing resilience self-awareness self-compassion strength training surprise

Envy or Esteem Reflection

They're everywhere. Physicians who own their own thriving practices. Physicians who lead departments and hospital systems. Physicians who lead well-being initiatives in effective, meaningful ways within their systems. Physician coaches who work clinically full-time. Physicians who have retired a...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance admiration agency appreciation aspiration authenticity celebration choices comparison confidence discontent envy esteem fulfillment highlight reel identity inspiration journey joy mindset priorities purpose reflection self-doubt self-worth shift strenghts uniqueness values

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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