Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Story and Reflection: What Story are You Telling?

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s TED Talk The Danger of a Single Story is one of my all-time favorites. She warns how a narrow narrative can distort the way we see people, cultures, even whole countries. But the danger of a single story doesn’t stop there. It shows up in how we see ourselves. The Singl...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 28, 2025 advocacy belonging coaching confidence doubt event evidence growth humility identity judgment lens meaning medicine narrative perception perspective proof reassurance reflection resident retelling story strengths stress supervisor

Structure Creates Culture: Lessons from Launching the Alaska GME Council

Culture doesn’t just “happen.” It’s shaped — often by the structures we choose. That was clear to me during the recent launch of the Alaska GME Council, a 3½-hour sprint where structure set the tone for team identity, purpose, and action. (And yes, it also showed up in my sleep — a classic sign o...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 28, 2025 action adoption agreements authenticity charter connection coordination culture decision-making design energy engagement foundation funding identity layout leadership meeting officers outcomes ownership principles priorities purpose reflection structure subcommittees team vision voice

Quiet Quitting, Nike’s Reframe, and the Real Risk in Medicine

Quiet quitting is no longer just a workplace buzzword. A new study in Family Medicine described how residency leaders are seeing disengagement, professionalism concerns, and strategic “time protection” among trainees. The authors traced this disengagement back to multiple causes: generational shi...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 13, 2025 burnout challenges collaboration commitment communication cringe culture discernment disengagement education efficiency effort faculty frustration generations growth mentorship motivation patient care professionalism quiet quitting rebranding reflection residency selectivity sustainability systemic pressures time protection trainees trust work values workplace

The Farmer's Table: Rethinking Stewardship in Medicine

When we talk about stewardship in medicine, it usually means handling precious resources wisely: Blood bank stewardship (don’t squander that O-negative so it’s there in a crisis) Antibiotic stewardship (use the narrowest spectrum possible, so we don’t fuel resistance) Resource stewardship (choo...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 12, 2025 balance boundaries burnout care clinic costs efficiency generosity inboxes listening medicine notes patients reflection resources shortages stewardship strain sustainability time tradeoffs well-being workforce

Not Everyone Gets a Seat at Your Table

In clinical & academic medicine, and in leadership, “they” shows up a lot. They’ll think I’m a joke. They can tell I don’t belong. They are totally judging me. But here’s the problem: “they” rarely has a face. A faceless crowd gets invited to our mental table of influence, and suddenly we’re serv...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 29, 2025 academia boundaries clarity colleagues comparison critics crowd decisions discernment doubt energy fear feedback growth influence judgment leaders leadership medicine overgeneralization perspective power reflection resilience source table voices worth

The Power of a Pen: Story and Reflection

Sometimes autonomy doesn’t start with a policy change or a big career decision. Sometimes it starts with… a pen. Last week, I listened to Dr. Jeff Haney, Vice Dean for Clinical Affairs at WSU Elson S. Floyd COM, share a story during a session on emotional intelligence. He described a night on cal...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 22, 2025 agency autonomy awareness burnout choice connection empowerment engagement fulfillment identity intentionality mindset resilience well-being

Beyond Labels: Story and Reflection

It’s not infrequent that I’m in conversation with a faculty member who’s frustrated with one or two residents they see as lazy or disengaged. Those moments take me right back to how I sometimes felt a decade ago, when I was burned out in my core faculty role. I remember the intensity of that frus...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 22, 2025 barriers burnout connection conversations criticism curiosity data defesiveness drive efficiency energy engagement exhuastion experience feedback frustration gaps growth immersion interviewing labels language learning minset motivation nuance patience perspective procrastination quality rapport reflection remediation repitition resources responsibility safety strengths support trust understanding

Responsibility Revisited: Story and Reflection

We don’t always talk about guilt in medicine unless it’s framed as toxic or as a byproduct of impossible systems. But some guilt is earned. Some of it’s useful. The kind that nudges us when we’ve strayed from our values. And some is not. What follows is a story out of several that came to mine fr...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 08, 2025 adaptation alignment awareness character conscience deicision ethics fatigue growth guilt integrity judgment learning medicine observation reflection residency responsibility self-correction values

Power of Conversation, Story and Invitation

A thoughtful reader recently wrote in and asked me: “How did you build the strong relationships you have with specialists?” At first, I wasn’t sure how to answer. My brain went to the tactical: referrals, shared patients, thank-yous. (These are still paramount. Doing your due diligence with worku...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 02, 2025 assumptions collaboration communication community connection consistency conversation curiosity empathy engagement fallibility grace gratitude habit humanity initiative intentionality invitation listening mindset overwhelm participation perfectionism presence professionalism reflection relationships respect support trust vulnerability

Right Pause, Right Time Story and Reflection

Years ago, I was leading a medical team in Southeast Asia after the tsunami. Infrastructure was gone, local health workers were either missing or tending to their own communities, and our team, hosted by a local NGO, was running long, hot, and emotionally heavy days. One morning, something was of...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 31, 2025 awareness breath burnout clarity cohesion compassion connection emotion gratitude healing humanity insight intention leadership listening medicine mindfulness observation pause perspective presence purpose recovery reflection resilience restoration support sustainability teamwork wellbeing

Behind the Blame: Story and Reflection

In medicine and academic leadership, change is constant. But the kind we choose feels different than the kind we don’t. Lately, I’ve found myself thinking about what lies beneath the surface when frustration rises. Sometimes what looks like resistance or blame turns out to be something else entir...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 24, 2025 acceptance blame change clarity collaboration conversation frustration grief honesty insight leadership loss mission purpose reality recognition resistance softening transition values

Story and Reflection: What Success Really Looks Like

As a new academic year begins—fresh name badges, new roles, different rhythms—I’ve been returning to a question I first heard from Dr. Kerri Palamara, a national leader in coaching in graduate medical education and Director of the Center for Physician Well-Being at Massachusetts General Hospital....

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 11, 2025 agency alignment aspirations authenticity awareness belonging career clarity coaching compassion connection curiosity fulfillment growth intention meaning navigation pause perspective presence purpose redefinition reflection relationships success transformation values well-being wholeness

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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