Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Waves and Wakes: Reflection
Reflections: Paddle-boarding on Waves & Wakes
Last November, I promised part 2 of my paddle-boarding lesson - so here it is. If you’ve ever been paddleboarding in the ocean, you know to expect waves. You bend your knees, stay flexible, and adjust your stance to keep your balance. It’s part of the...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptability
anticipatory grace
balance
clam within chaos
core strength
emotional agility
equanimity
expectation
flexibility
grounding
inner anchor
mindset
non reactivity
perspective shift
postural awareness
preparation
purposeful adjustment
readiness
resilience
self regulation
situational awareness
turbulence
uncertainty navigation
values
values alignment
wake readiness
Story and Reflection: Foundations First
You know my husband and I have taken on quite a few renovation projects over the years. Back in medical school and residency, we bought an old historic home in a neighborhood filled with beautifully restored houses. Of course, we could only afford the fixer-upper.
It was built on piers and had pl...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
baton passing
capacity building
collaboration
collective effort
enduring value
faith in action
foundation
generativity
groundwork
infrastructure
intentional design
investment
legacy
long view
mission aligned
patience
perseverance
purpose driven
ripple impact
rootedness
servant leadership
slow growth
stewardship
structural integrity
systems building
unseen labor
vision
Reflection: Passing it On
This past week, I had the great honor of sitting in a (virtual) room with five individuals who have dedicated decades of their careers to leadership in graduate medical education (GME).
The idea for this gathering started one morning when I woke up thinking about how tough leading in GME can be. ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
collaborative growth
collective wisdom
community
connection
cultivation
honoring
humility
impact
influence
inspiration
intergenerational learning
knowledge transfer
leadership
legacy
longevity
meaning making
mentorship
reflective practice
ripple effect
slow leadership
stewardship
storytelling
transparency
vision casting
vulnerability
wisdom
Two Travelers and A Mountain: Tale and Reflection
Two explorers set out on a journey to find a hidden village high in the mountains. Both were experienced travelers, used to well-marked paths, sturdy bridges, and reliable guides.
They started on different sides of the mountain which strattled two countries. The first traveler was started in an...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
acceptance
adaptation
agency
awareness
calm in chaos
clarity
comparison
expectation reset
expectations
frustration
internal shift
journey
mindset
orientation
perspective
presence
privilege
purpose
reframing
resilience
resistance
surrender
systems thinking
transformation
trial and error
Wake Up Call in Paradise: Story and Reflection
In 2018, our annual mid-winter break took us to Hawaii with our adult daughters and our one grand-little at the time. We stayed together in an Airbnb, soaking up the warmth and beauty of the islands.
One morning, I took the grand in the stroller while the others split into two groups of runners h...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
acceptance
calm in chaos
clarity
composure
detachment
emergency
faith
false alarm
family
gratitude
grounding
instinct
legacy
meaning
mindfulness
mindset
perspective
presence
priority reset
reflection
resilience
surrealism
surrender
uncertainty
value alignment
The Helper's Fine Line: Story and Reflection
I usually received good grades and positive comments on my report cards as a kid. However, I received one remark from my first-grade teacher that I wasn't sure how to take. She wrote, "Tonya is sometimes too helpful to her neighbors."
Being helpful is good, right?
I mean, Dawn was struggling with...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
autonomy
boundaries
burnout
capacity building
coaching
developmental struggle
discomfort
enablement
expectations
growth
growth mindset
helicoptering
independence
intention
learning
mental muscle
mentoring
modeling
overhelping
pause
rescuing
role clarity
self-efficacy
supportive leadership
trust
Time Hack and Emotions: Story and Reflection
Time Hack - I'm modeling scheduled rest and boundaries, so I got creative with scheduling this week's reflection. 😊 Time-hack - make your work count twice. I'm working smarter not harder - linking you to the reflection from my blog rather than writing something new while I'm off.
The story: I'm o...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
automation
balance
boundaries
creativity
delegation
efficiency
emotional awareness
flexibility
intentionality
off-grid
pacing
prioritization
reflection
rest
self-care
self-permission
simplicity
smart working
sustainability
time management
The Draft Reflection
At the start of the pandemic, my primary role was in a private practice setting, though I still filled in as faculty at the residency (as I do now).
In our group of six physicians and one PA, we were constantly using every resource available to stay up to date on the ever-evolving science—what it...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptability
advocacy
balance
bandwidth
burnout
collaboration
communication
community
drafting
educaiton
energy management
information fatigue
leadership
misinformation
overload
pacing
perspective
priorities
public health
recovery
reflection
regulation
resilience
resource sharing
solidarity
support
sustainability
teamwork
trust
uncertainty
Filtering Voices: Story and Reflection
Like many medical students, I went back and forth on what specialty I really loved. OB/GYN? Sports Medicine? Internal Medicine? Rheum? Endocrine? Psychiatry? Adolescent Medicine? (Yes, all of them!)
I also had a fantastic role model in my dad, an outpatient family doc beloved by his patients. And...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
affirmation
belonging
choice
clarity
compassion
confidence
courage
decision making
doubt
encouragement
identity
influence
insecurity
integrity
internal guidance
judgment
medical culture
mentorship
perception
power dynamics
purpose
reassurance
reflection
respect
self-trust
soundtracks
validation
values
voice
wisdom
Reflection: The Adventure of Conversation
I had just turned a group of faculty workshop participants loose to help each other work on short term career goals & to do so by practicing their new coaching skills with each other.
I encouraged them to keep their advice-monster at bay. (See Michael Bungay Stanier's The Advice Trap).
When they ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
advice trap
awareness
co-creation
coaching
communication
connection
curiosity
discovery
empathy
engagement
exploration
facilitation
growth
guidance
insight
interaction
learning
listening
mindset
non-judgment
openness
pattern recognition
physician habit
practice
presence
reflection
restraint
storytelling
transformation
trust
Blindfolds: Story and Reflection
For better or worse (mostly better), I'm partly the result of having an older sister.
When we were kids, she had brilliant ideas for games. One of her favorites? A blindfolded taste test.
She claimed it was all in good fun—but let’s be honest, it was her sneaky way of trying to cure my “ridiculou...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
agency
autonomy
boundaries
childhood
coaching
competence
control
curiosity
empowerment
encouragement
experimentation
growth
humor
individuality
insight
learning
memory
non-judgment
persuasion
playfulness
psychological safety
reflection
relatedness
resilience
resistance
self-discovery
skepticism
support
trial and error
trust
Word of the Year Reflection
Choosing a word of the year provides a simple yet powerful compass that can guide your decisions, actions, and mindset throughout the year. It's like a quick check-in on your purpose statement focused on 2025.
As we step into a new year, take 15 minutes to sit quietly with yourself and reflect. A...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptability
alignment
amalgamation
blending
choice
clarity
coaching
decision making
direction
empowerment
flexibility
focus
guidance
identity
integration
intention
leadership
mentoring
mindfulness
personal growth
purpose
reflection
resilience
roles
self-awareness
strength
transformation
transition
values
word of the year
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
