Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Great Progress Reflection
What's in a subject line? Specifically an email subject line. No, this isn't a reflection on best email practices. Just the power of words.
You know how we often keep a dialog going via email by replying to the original one sent, creating a chain of emails?
Well, these past couple of weeks, I hav...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
awareness
communication
correspondence
digital dialogue
email
emotion
energy
experiment
framing
impact
influence
intention
interaction
language
messaging
mindfulness
mood
naming
narrative
perception
priming
reflection
resonance
response
subject line
tone
tone setting
word choice
"The Plank" Story and Reflection
Most Sunday mornings during the pandemic, I logged on to a zoom call to do strength training with a group of women physicians led by Dr. Ali Novitsky (photo above) or her team of coaches.
She combined mindset work with bodywork. On particular workout stands out to me. She told us we were finishin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
all-or-nothing
binary thinking
bodywork
capacity
challenge
choice
coaching
discipline
discomfort
effort
endurance
flexibility
growth
incremental progress
learning
mental flexibility
mindset
mindset shift
motivation
perseverance
persistence
physicality
reflection
reframing
resilience
self-awareness
self-compassion
strength training
surprise
Envy or Esteem Reflection
They're everywhere.
Physicians who own their own thriving practices.
Physicians who lead departments and hospital systems.
Physicians who lead well-being initiatives in effective, meaningful ways within their systems.
Physician coaches who work clinically full-time.
Physicians who have retired a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
acceptance
admiration
agency
appreciation
aspiration
authenticity
celebration
choices
comparison
confidence
discontent
envy
esteem
fulfillment
highlight reel
identity
inspiration
journey
joy
mindset
priorities
purpose
reflection
self-doubt
self-worth
shift
strenghts
uniqueness
values
Costly Lunch Laughs, Story and Reflection
Back in 2003, I was with four friends in Germany. We ducked into a diner for lunch. The two guys were just hilarious. Their dry sense of humor and perfect timing had us laughing so hard we could barely catch our breaths - literally for my friend Cheryl. 😳
She inhaled food upon laughing, and then ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
action
adrenaline
amygdala
bravery
compassion
courage
decision making
discomfort
doubt
fear
freeze response
growth
hesitation
humor
inner conflict
instinct
intuition
knowing
leadership
ownership
paradox
presene
pressure
reaction
reflection
rescue
responsibility
self-trust
urgency
vulnerability
Anniversaries and Analogies Reflection
Just prior to marrying the man in this photo (throwback to big hair 😂), his dad handed us an article torn out of a magazine. It used comparative imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage. The takeaway gist in my young mind was 1. Don't be shocked by the rapids, which are a natura...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
acceptance
adaptation
celebration
challenge
change
curiosity
emotions
endurance
evolution
forewarning
growth
imposter syndrome
journey
marriage
metaphor
mindset
navigation
partnership
perspective
phases
preparation
reflection
relationships
resilience
self-doubt
support
transformation
transition
uncertainty
whitewater
What's Missing Reflection
You know those times when two clothing items randomly end up next to each other in the laundry, and you see a new outfit? No, just me?
Well, anyway, I had a similar thing happen as three situations juxtaposed together to open up my thinking. The first one involved a couple of group sessions in w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
automatic thoughts
awareness
bias
circumstance
clarity
coaching
confidence
distortion
empowerment
evidence
facts
filtering
insight
internal dialogue
juxtaposition
mindset
minset shift
narrative
perception
positivity
reflection
reframing
self-perception
self-talk
self-worth
storylines
thought distortions
truth telling
validation
value
Laughs and Confidence, Story and Reflection
I was recently discussing confidence in the lecture setting with a few faculty physicians, and it brought up some memories.
One of the first didactics I taught as a new faculty member was 9 years out of residency. (Actual photo around that time of me as new faculty, 2007-2008 above.) I was presen...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
authenticity
confidence
connection
courage
credibility
didactic
education
expertise
growth mindset
humility
humor
identity
imperfection
imposter-phenomenon
insecurity
learning
mentorship
partnership
presence
presentation
reflection
relatability
resilience
self-acceptance
support
teaching
teamwork
transparency
vulnerability
Navigation Story and Reflection
Years ago, my young nephew was carpooling to school with us in my new Honda Odyssey minivan that had my first navigation system. From the captain chair behind me, he exclaimed, "Oh COOL Aunt Tonya! You have a force field?!" It took me a minute to realize he was talking about my dashboard location...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
amygdala
analogy
boundaries
calm
childhood
control
countertransference
curiosity
detachment
emotions
empathy
forcefield
humor
imagination
inner-peace
mindset
narrative
navigation
perspective
protection
reaction
reflection
reframe
regulation
resilience
road-rage
self-awareness
triggers
understanding
visualization
wonder
Runners Mindset: Story and Reflection
I took training very seriously for my first 1/2 marathon (the Mayor's half in Anchorage) back in 2016. My friend Lana (wearing the blue tank) was a seasoned runner who thought my schedule was overly structured and intense. She'd run several halves and a few marathons. Still, I insisted, that we s...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
accountability
assumptions
comparison
discipline
encouragement
endurance
frustration
half-marathon
inspiration
intensity
intention
mindset
miscommunication
misunderstanding
motivation
overthinking
partnership
perception
persistence
perspective
positivity
research
resilience
self-doubt
setback
stamina
structure
success
support
teamwork
training
The Snapshot: Story and Reflection
One day around 30 years ago or so, my husband, a 3rd year medical student had the weekend off and I, a 2nd year, had no upcoming exams. So, we drove an hour to visit family. We, including our 4 year old, wanted to show off how our newborn had grown.
I had taken a whopping 1-week off for maternity...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
balance
belonging
clarity
connection
default-mode
family
gratitude
intention
joy
legacy
meaning
memory
mindfulness
perspective
presence
purpose
reflection
simplicity
values
Unconventional, Story and Reflection
Many of you know that my husband and I had our kids during training. It was most definitely not common in the 90's to do so, especially with both of us in medical school and residency. But, hey, we embraced the unconventional.
Our girls learned to march to their own tunes as well. Especially the ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
confidence
courage
creativity
curiosity
experimentation
fearlessness
growth
humor
innovation
inspiration
nourishment
parenthood
possibility
redesign
resilience
risk-taking
support
training
unconventional
Boundaries and Antics, Story and Reflection
Many of you know I recommend Brave Boundaries, a book by Dr. Sasha Shillcutt. After she co-hosted a group session for residents and faculty last year, I saw Aardvark (that's our pet-name for our older style Roomba vacuum) and his virtual barrier shown in the photo in a new light. That little cont...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
awareness
boundaries
consequences
experience
growth
humor
instinct
intuition
judgment
learning
planning
protection
reflection
reflex
resilience
risk
safety
self-preservation
vulnerability
wisdom
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections