Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: reflection
Showing 12 results:
Brads Over Lectures
When our youngest daughter was about four, she was watching my husband rescreen a door.
She stood there studying what he was doing and asked, “What’s that, Dad? Are you putting in brads, Dad?”
I remember thinking, What’s a brad?
She knew because she had spent a lot of time following her dad aroun...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Sep 11, 2026
adaptability
apprenticeship
coaching
collaboration
confidence
creativity
curiosity
development
discovery
education
engagement
experience
exploration
figureoutable
gme
growth
healthcare
independence
initiative
inquiry
leadership
learning
learning by doing
medicine
mentorship
modeling
observation
parenting
persistence
physicians
practice
problem solving
reflection
residency
resilience
resourcefulness
teaching
training
Acting Out of Character
A common tension came up during a coaching conversation with a brilliant, deeply thoughtful coachee.
With a lot of diligent work, she has grown more comfortable being and showing her authentic self rather than holding back or becoming someone different for other people’s comfort.
Now she is facin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Sep 04, 2026
adaptability
adaptation
alignment
authentic leadership
authenticity
awareness
behavior
boundaries
coaching
communicaiton
communication style
confidence
congruence
connection
courage
development
emotional awareness
emotional intelligence
expression
extroversion
fulfillment
growth
identity
influence
integrity
interpersonal
introversion
leadership
motivation
performance
personal growth
personality
presence
psychology
purpose
purposefulness
reflection
relationships
renewal
resilience
restoration
self-abandonment
self-acceptance
self-awareness
self-expression
teaching
temperament
values
vulnerability
wellbeing
Caring Enough to Tell the Truth
I’ve been reflecting on a situation someone close to me recently faced in her work as a consultant.
She was brought into a high-stakes situation by her boss, who had asked her to help a close friend. The friend believed that other people involved in an important transition were the problem. Her a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 28, 2026
accountability
advocacy
boundaries
candor
care
clinicians
coaching
communication
compassion
conflict
courage
development
dignity
education
empathy
evaluation
expectations
faculty
fairness
feedback
growth
healthcare
honesty
integrity
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
patient care
performance
professionalism
reflection
relationships
remediation
residency
residents
responsibility
standards
supervision
support
teaching
transparency
trust
truth
When an Unexpected Next Step is the Right One
When I began telling people I was considering becoming the Founding Program Director of a new family medicine residency in rural Eastern Washington, the responses were not exactly subtle.
“Are you nuts?”
“Do you need me to say WTF, Tonya?!”
And, perhaps most thoughtfully:
“This doesn’t seem align...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 19, 2026
access
accreditation
alignment
building
calling
career
change
coaching
collaboration
commitment
community
courage
culture
curriculum
decisions
development
discernment
education
faculty
family
gme
growth
healthcare
impact
innovation
intention
leadership
medicine
mentorship
mission
moses lake
opportunity
physicians
primary care
purpose
reflection
residency
residents
resilience
rural
samaritan
service
sustainability
systems
teaching
teams
throughline
training
transformation
transition
trust
washington
workforce
wsu
wwami
Friendships on Purpose
I’m writing from my kitchen counter, sitting on one of the few things not making the journey to Washington: our kitchen stools.
Behind me, three people are wrapping and taping up nearly everything we own. They start loading the truck tomorrow. We are down to one drawer, one cabinet, one coffee ma...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 14, 2026
#bemyfriend
alaska
anchorage
authenticity
ballard
belonging
community
companionship
conference
connection
courage
encouragement
friendship
friendship building
girdwood
gratitude
intentionality
invitation
kindness
medicine
memories
mentorship
moving
networking
physicians
presence
purpose
reflection
relationships
relocation
resilience
retirement
reunion
storyslam
storytelling
support
transition
vulnerability
washington
wellbeing
women
Planning the Unpredictable
As my move out of Alaska gets closer, I find myself increasingly reflective.
There is something to the saying that life is what happens while we’re making plans. Nineteen years ago, I finally gave in to my husband’s persistent suggestion that we go “look” at Alaska. We stepped off the plane, fel...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 07, 2026
adventure
alaska
belonging
change
clarity
community
decisions
faith
family
family medicine
grandchildren
gratitude
growth
home
journey
legacy
moving
next chapter
northwest
planning
priorities
purpose
reflection
residency
resilience
retirement
transition
vision
washington
wenatchee
Pick Up the Phone
A couple of weeks ago, I was juggling multiple time-sensitive projects when someone began doing work which I felt was mine to do, that I wanted to do, and in an order that made no sense to me.
I initially reacted from momentary frustration.
Becoming a coach does not uninstall the old neural pathw...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 31, 2026
acceptance
activation
adaptability
awareness
breathing
burnout
centering
compassion
connection
creativity
curiosity
emotional intelligence
emotions
empathy
grounding
growth
learning
mindfulness
mindset
nervous system
neuroscience
pathways
patience
perspective
reactions
reflection
regulation
relationships
residency
resilience
responding
self-awareness
self-regulation
stress
transformation
trust
wellness
The River Gets Wider
Just prior to marrying my husband, his dad handed us an article torn from a magazine. It used the imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage.
The gist that stuck with my young mind was:1. Don’t be shocked by the rapids. They’re a natural outcome of two forces merging.2. Marriage w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 25, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
adaptation
adjustment
balance
becoming
career
change
coaching
commitment
confidence
courage
endurance
expectations
flexibility
gratitude
growth
hope
imperfection
joy
leadership
life transitions
marriage
medicine
mindset
navigation
partnership
perseverance
perspective
physicians
preparation
presence
progress
purpose
rapids
recovery
reflection
relationships
renewal
resilience
self-copmpassion
stability
strength
transformation
transition
trust
uncertainty
wellbeing
whitewater
The Price of Value
This week's theme comes straight from Facebook Marketplace.
My husband (who is not a social media guy) asked me to list his Kubota skid steer for "69-9."
So I did.
I had just sold his utility trailer for $2,200, so I entered all the details, uploaded the photos, and hit Publish.
Within seconds, s...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 17, 2026
abundance
advocacy
appreciation
authenticity
awareness
belief
business
compensation
confidence
contribution
courage
empowerment
encouragement
entrepreneurship
expertise
family medicine
financial health
generosity
gratitude
growth
identity
impact
influence
leadership
medicine
mentorship
mindset
negotiation
opportunity
perception
perspective
physicians
purpose
recognition
reflection
self-advocacy
self-worth
service
support
sustainability
undervaluing
validation
value
visibility
worth
worthiness
The Bump Nobody Warned You About
A webinar this week about the evolution of a rural residency program inspired this week's reflections. In addition to the successes and growing pains, the thing that caught my attention was the sheer number of changes they had both created and endured.
In just 11 years, the program had 4 Chief Me...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 10, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
adaptation
agility
alignment
awareness
change
change management
collaboration
commitment
communication
complexity
continuity
culture
endurance
evolution
expectations
flexibility
growth
healthcare
innovation
leadership
leadership development
medicine
mindset
mission
mission focus
navigation
organizational health
organizations
perseverance
perspective
preparedness
puprose
reflection
residency
resilience
rural
stability
stewarship
sustainability
systems
teamwork
transformation
transition
trust
turbulence
turnover
uncertainty
Building Impact Capacity
This week I did something new.
I asked Claude to forecast my workload after I entered in all the things from my calendar and everything that wasn’t. It included my coaching practice, presentations, faculty development, travel, writing, a new time-limited leadership role I'll share more about soon...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 10, 2026
agency
alignment
attention
awareness
boundaries
capacity
capacity building
change
clarity
collaboration
commitment
communication
compelxity
decision-making
delegation
design
efficiency
energy
expectations
focus
forecasting
foundation
growth
impact
intentionality
leadership
momentum
organization
planning
preparation
prevention
priorities
prioritization
proactivity
readiness
reflection
resources
simplification
stewardship
strategy
sustainability
sustems
time
tradeoffs
transformation
transition
workload
The Tyranny of the Unfamiliar
Recently, I brought a situation to my coach because I was concerned I might be facing an ethical dilemma.
As we worked through it together, it became clear I was actually on solid ground.
What I was experiencing wasn't an ethics issue. It was just discomfort.
What's interesting is that I've sat w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 26, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
adaptation
adjustment
agility
awareness
calibration
capacity
chagne
challenge
coaching
confidence
coping
courage
curiosity
development
discomfort
emotional-intelligence
endurance
enviornment
experience
familiarity
flexibility
growth
leadership
learning
mentorship
mindfulness
mindset
perseverance
perspective
planning
preparation
problem solving
progress
readiness
recovery
reflection
resilience
resourcing
self-awareness
strategy
support
sustainability
transformation
uncertainty
wellbeing
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
