Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: perspective
Showing 12 results:
A Christmas Epiphany (From the Archives)
Early in our marriage, we lived in an ongoing renovation of a historic home. It had an entryway with stairs wrapping up to the second floor, creating the ideal spot for our Christmas tree. We would take the girls to the tree farm and pick out the largest one with near-perfect branches and set it ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 23, 2026
adaptation
awareness
balance
behavior
calm
change
clarity
cognition
communication
conflict
connection
control
emotion
environment
family
growth
habits
holidays
influence
innner dialogue
joy
marriage
mindset
narrative
perfectionism
perspective
psychology
reflection
regulation
relationships
resilience
self awareness
soundtracks
stress
thinking
traditions
trigger
wellbeing
What the Critic Taught Me
I was talking with a physician recently who started his own practice.
Someone had asked about him in a local Facebook group. There were about thirty responses. Not just “he’s good,” but detailed, generous paragraphs about his skill, empathy, time, and care.
And then one line:
“My mom saw him and ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 23, 2026
adaptability
attention
awareness
beliefs
boundaries
burnout
coaching
comparison
confidence
criticism
delegation
development
emotions
empathy
feeback
focus
grace
growth
identity
improvement
interpretation
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
mindset
narrative
perspective
physician
practice
purpose
reflection
reputation
resilience
reviews
selfworth
trigger
validation
values
wellbeing
Back to Now: When the Clock Stops Judging You
A physician I was coaching recently brought this to a session:
“I’m always running late in clinic.”
If you work in medicine in this day and age, you know that reality.
But as we slowed it down, she noticed something important:
‘Late’ has judgment.
The actual data?
She walked into the room at 10:3...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 27, 2026
acceptance
attention
awareness
balance
calm
clarity
coaching
compassion
data
decision making
efficiency
effort
emotion
focus
healthcare
insight
judgment
medicine
mental health
midnfulness
observation
organization
overwhelm
patient care
perception
performance
perspective
physician
presence
prioritization
process
productivity
reflection
reslience
self-awareness
self-compassion
stress
surgeon
thoughts
wellbeing
workflow
Tools and Strategies
Mindset
I always spend a lot of time on mindset. It is foundational and under-discussed. However, if we only change mindset without also learning strategies and new tools, many things will stay the same.
For instance, you may have a whole new outlook on your inbox. But if you want to improve comm...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 27, 2026
accountability
alignment
assertiveness
awareness
boundaries
burnout
clarity
cognitive load
communication
compassion
conflict
decision making
development
efficiency
emotional intelligence
empowerment
energy management
execution
feedback
focus
growth
intentionality
kindness
leadership
mindset
ownership
perspective
prevention
prioritization
proactivity
processes
productivity
professionalism
psychological safety
reactivity
reflection
relationships
repair
resilience
respect
response
sbar
self-efficacy
self-leadership
self-regulation
strategy
structure
systems
triage
Marine Survival Weekend (From the Archives)
As a faculty member of the Alaska Family Medicine Residency program, I had my share of teaching during our infamous Wilderness Medicine Weekend excursion. In January, it involved snow cave construction, and in May, it involved marine safety. The first spring, I participated with 2 other faculty m...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 23, 2026
accountability
adaptability
alaska
awareness
education
embarassment
experience
growth
humility
insight
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
perspective
professionalism
reflection
reframing
residency
resilience
responsibility
safety
teaching
teamwork
trust
wilderness
wisdom
Same Game, Different Frame
Two men played chess a few evenings near the main path before dinner. It was entertaining to pass by and see them deep in strategic concentration.
One night, two photos were taken about twenty minutes apart from different angles.
In the first, the light, sky, and ocean make it feel expansive. So ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 21, 2026
aperture
awareness
chess
contrast
curiosity
discourse
empathy
flexibility
framing
gratitude
growth
humility
insight
interpretation
leadership
lens
light
love
medicine
metaphor
mindfulness
mindset
narrative
perception
perspective
presence
psychology
reflection
relationships
strategy
vantage
Beauty and Belonging Discovered After Change (From the Archives)
When we moved from Florida to Alaska in 2007, it wasn't necessarily a big hit with our teenage girls. My oldest moved off to college saying she would visit us but she wasn't "moving out of the country." My youngest, was about to start 8th grade and had strong opinions about leaving her friends an...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 18, 2026
acceptance
adaptation
adolescence
alaska
awareness
beauty
belonging
change
community
discovery
family
gratitude
growth
home
identity
impermanence
intentin
joy
mindfulness
nature
perspective
presence
refleciton
reflection
resilience
transformation
transition
Story and Reflection: By the Book
A lighter note for today. I thought it’d be fun to share a story about what happens when my rule-follower tendencies show up at the exact moment my plan stops matching reality.
Not too long ago, while traveling with multiple stops, airline changes, and short layovers, I was determined to fit ever...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jan 28, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
control
determination
flexibility
frustration
humility
humor
improvisation
mindfulness
partnership
patience
perseverance
perspective
planning
problem-solving
reflection
resilience
rules
travel
When Influence Stops Influencing
Every physician leader I coach eventually reaches the same moment. They’ve done the work: gathered data, built coalitions, shared meaningful stories, aligned it to the core corporate values, used every bit of their Crucial Conversations skill set, emotionally intelligenced the nuances, and framed...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Dec 10, 2025
acceptance
agency
alignment
boundaries
burnout
change
clarity
coalition
community
connection
discernment
energy
exhaustion
frustration
influence
integrity
leadership
mentorship
metrics
perspective
process
purpose
reality
reflection
regulation
resistance
strategy
systems
values
Grateful for Rejection? A Post-Thanksgiving Reflection
If you’re feeling maxed out on gratitude messages this month, you’re not alone. The day after Thanksgiving tends to expose the gap between the gratitude we’re “supposed” to feel and how our brains actually work. That gap is where the science gets interesting. So instead of another round of holida...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Dec 10, 2025
acceptance
awareness
bias
burnout
clarity
disappointment
ego
gratitude
growth
happiness
insight
mindfulness
mindset
mood
negativity
perspective
positivity
psychology
purpose
reflection
reframing
resilience
sleep
stress
When Effort Feels Right
A couple of weeks ago, my friend, colleague, and physician advocate Dr. Sasha Shillcutt wrote something that grabbed my attention:
“Can we all stop shaming women who work hard?”
It resonated.
The pendulum has needed to swing toward rest and boundaries for a long time. We’ve finally begun to norma...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Nov 14, 2025
agency
alignment
autonomy
awareness
balance
boundaries
burnout
choice
clarity
compassion
curiosity
discipline
effort
energy
expectations
flow
fulfillment
inquiry
insight
intention
judgment
mindfulness
obligation
overload
passion
people pleasing
perfectionism
perspective
priorities
purpose
recovery
reflection
reset
rest
self-care
shame
signals
support
sustainability
tells
validation
wellbeing
work
Ask Responsibly
I was thinking recently about how agreeable my AI assistant, Scribbs, is with me. He’s great at coming up with answers in the direction I point him - quick to confirm, validate, or spot what might be off.
It’s a lot like those friends we turn to when we just want someone to agree with us.
But I’v...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Oct 24, 2025
ai
alignment
assumption
awareness
bias
clarity
confirmation
connection
course-correction
criticism
curiosity
detective
dialogue
direction
excitement
exploration
feedback
growth
guidance
humility
impulsivity
inquiry
insight
intention
judgment
learning
listening
meaning-making
mindset
mirror
oversight
perspective
purpose
questions
reflection
reframing
relevance
self-talk
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
