
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: mindset
Showing 12 results:
Power of Conversation, Story and Invitation
A thoughtful reader recently wrote in and asked me: “How did you build the strong relationships you have with specialists?”
At first, I wasn’t sure how to answer. My brain went to the tactical: referrals, shared patients, thank-yous. (These are still paramount. Doing your due diligence with worku...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 02, 2025
assumptions
collaboration
communication
community
connection
consistency
conversation
curiosity
empathy
engagement
fallibility
grace
gratitude
habit
humanity
initiative
intentionality
invitation
listening
mindset
overwhelm
participation
perfectionism
presence
professionalism
reflection
relationships
respect
support
trust
vulnerability
Mise en Place for the Mind
One of my coachees recently identified the missing link in his project workflow. (Thanks for the metaphor, Michael Caçoilo! - shared with permission.)
He had developed the right structure for him: breaking big tasks into smaller chunks and blocking time to get them done. But something still felt ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 21, 2025
awareness
clarity
coaching
connection
efficiency
engagement
execution
focus
habits
insight
intentionality
leadership
metaphor
mindset
mise-en-place
planning
pre-work
preparation
presence
productivity
professionalism
readiness
reflection
structure
time blocking
trust
workflow
Confessions of a Former Night Owl: Story and Reflection on Identity, Change, and Quiet Growth
We often resist change when it feels like it threatens who we are. But not all change is self-abandonment.
Not long ago, someone shared that she felt a surprising amount of grief around changing—even when the change was meant to help a relationship work better. Authenticity was a deeply held valu...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptation
adjustment
alignment
authenticity
change
commitment
curiosity
discovery
evolution
flexibility
grief
growth
habits
identity
intention
mindset
motivation
openness
patterns
resistance
selfhood
surprises
transformation
values
willingness
Staying Power Reflection
A couple of weeks ago, I had the gift of facilitating a panel discussion with seasoned leaders in academic family medicine — people whose careers span decades, whose influence is immeasurable. I asked them to name a single word or phrase that captured what contributed to their longevity in this w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
belief
calling
creativity
detachment
emotional wisdom
endurance
generativity
hope
imagination
impact
inspiration
leadership
legacy
longevity
meaning
mindset
optimism
purpose
resilience
ripple effect
sustainability
trust
vision
Waves and Wakes: Reflection
Reflections: Paddle-boarding on Waves & Wakes
Last November, I promised part 2 of my paddle-boarding lesson - so here it is. If you’ve ever been paddleboarding in the ocean, you know to expect waves. You bend your knees, stay flexible, and adjust your stance to keep your balance. It’s part of the...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptability
anticipatory grace
balance
clam within chaos
core strength
emotional agility
equanimity
expectation
flexibility
grounding
inner anchor
mindset
non reactivity
perspective shift
postural awareness
preparation
purposeful adjustment
readiness
resilience
self regulation
situational awareness
turbulence
uncertainty navigation
values
values alignment
wake readiness
Two Travelers and A Mountain: Tale and Reflection
Two explorers set out on a journey to find a hidden village high in the mountains. Both were experienced travelers, used to well-marked paths, sturdy bridges, and reliable guides.
They started on different sides of the mountain which strattled two countries. The first traveler was started in an...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
acceptance
adaptation
agency
awareness
calm in chaos
clarity
comparison
expectation reset
expectations
frustration
internal shift
journey
mindset
orientation
perspective
presence
privilege
purpose
reframing
resilience
resistance
surrender
systems thinking
transformation
trial and error
Wake Up Call in Paradise: Story and Reflection
In 2018, our annual mid-winter break took us to Hawaii with our adult daughters and our one grand-little at the time. We stayed together in an Airbnb, soaking up the warmth and beauty of the islands.
One morning, I took the grand in the stroller while the others split into two groups of runners h...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
acceptance
calm in chaos
clarity
composure
detachment
emergency
faith
false alarm
family
gratitude
grounding
instinct
legacy
meaning
mindfulness
mindset
perspective
presence
priority reset
reflection
resilience
surrealism
surrender
uncertainty
value alignment
Reflection: The Adventure of Conversation
I had just turned a group of faculty workshop participants loose to help each other work on short term career goals & to do so by practicing their new coaching skills with each other.
I encouraged them to keep their advice-monster at bay. (See Michael Bungay Stanier's The Advice Trap).
When they ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
advice trap
awareness
co-creation
coaching
communication
connection
curiosity
discovery
empathy
engagement
exploration
facilitation
growth
guidance
insight
interaction
learning
listening
mindset
non-judgment
openness
pattern recognition
physician habit
practice
presence
reflection
restraint
storytelling
transformation
trust
Reflecting on Two Things
In preparing for the AMWA Evolve Leadership Course for trainees session on Difficult Conversations, I've been reflecting on principles from Crucial Conversations, Super Communicators, Non-Violent Communication, and How to Work with Almost Anyone (all highly recommended books).
We often fall into ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
awareness
balance
binary thinking
communication
compassion
complexity
conflict resolution
contradiction
curiosity
discernment
emotional intelligence
empathy
fool's choice
grace
growth
honesty
kindness
labeling
mindset
nuance
overgeneralization
paradox
perspective
polarity thinking
reflection
relationship
self-regulation
truth
understanding
wake
All That Jazz Story and Reflection
I'm going to give away one of the truths that throws people off when I play two truths and a lie. I learned to tap dance and even performed on stage after I was a practicing physician. I know, I know - hard to picture. 😉
My daughter was taking violin lessons in a studio that had just started offe...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
all-or-nothing
awkwardness
challenge
control
creativity
discomfort
encouragement
expectations
feedback
fun
growth mindset
inspiration
learning
letting go
mastery
mindset
motivation
patience
perfectionism
performance
perseverance
personal growth
practice
reflection
reframe
resilience
role modeling
self-awareness
self-compassion
vulnerability
Winning Reflections
As we close out 2024, I want to point our minds toward the wins. What you learned, what impact you made, how you grew, etc. You all know it's one area I like to be intentional and savor.
Last week, my own coach just elevated the process for me by 1. recognizing something I was unknowingly doing a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
affirmation
awareness
celebration
coaching
communication
confidence
energy
feedback
growth
insight
intentionality
leadership
learning
mindset
positivity
preparation
process
progress
recognition
reflection
reinforcement
repeatability
rumination
savoring
self-awareness
shift
success
sustainability
team dynamics
widsom
Best Laid Plans: Story and Reflection
I enjoy it when people expand and contrast the meanings of words. It gives me a better grasp of various approaches. I came across a quote from Sahil Bloom that did just that:
"Preparation always beats planning. Planning is based on the expectation of order. Preparation is based on the expectation...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
adaptability
calm
control
creativity
emotional intelligence
engagement
evolution
expectations
flexibility
foresight
grace
humor
idealism
improvisation
leadership
learning
mindset
perspective
pivoting
planning
preparation
presence
problem solving
recovery
reflection
resilience
responsiveness
self-regulation
teaching
uncertainty
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
