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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: mindset

Showing 12 results:


Childhood Courage
In our early days as a family with one car, my husband's boss would pick him up for work up on a motorcycle. He kept the spare helmet at our house. Our oldest, a toddler at the time, had an instinctual and intense fear of the helmet -- even when Mark was wearing it (wise beyond her years?). This ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 18, 2026 action behavior bravery breakthrough challenge change childhood coaching comfort-zone confidence courage determination development empowerment family fear fearlessness future goal-setting growth habits inspiration learning life-lessons mindfulness mindset motivation overcoming parenting personal-growth progress psychology reflection resilience reward risk self-growth storytelling success transformation vision
What Renovation Taught Me About Teams
My husband and I are back in the messy middle of building. We are not a strangers to it. We completely renovated a historic home over seven years and our Alaskan home over ten, with my husband acting as contractor, doing the work he enjoyed and subbing the rest out. And now, we’re building remote...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 13, 2026 adaptation alignment behavior building change clarity co-creation collaboration communication conflict construction creativity decision making development dynamics expectations forming friction group growth homebuilding innovation leadership learning marriage mindset organization partnership patience performing problem solving process progress reflection remodel renovation resilience satisfaction storming structure teams teamwork transformation uncertainty vision
Tools and Strategies
Mindset I always spend a lot of time on mindset. It is foundational and under-discussed. However, if we only change mindset without also learning strategies and new tools, many things will stay the same. For instance, you may have a whole new outlook on your inbox. But if you want to improve comm...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 27, 2026 accountability alignment assertiveness awareness boundaries burnout clarity cognitive load communication compassion conflict decision making development efficiency emotional intelligence empowerment energy management execution feedback focus growth intentionality kindness leadership mindset ownership perspective prevention prioritization proactivity processes productivity professionalism psychological safety reactivity reflection relationships repair resilience respect response sbar self-efficacy self-leadership self-regulation strategy structure systems triage
Same Game, Different Frame
Two men played chess a few evenings near the main path before dinner. It was entertaining to pass by and see them deep in strategic concentration. One night, two photos were taken about twenty minutes apart from different angles. In the first, the light, sky, and ocean make it feel expansive. So ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 21, 2026 aperture awareness chess contrast curiosity discourse empathy flexibility framing gratitude growth humility insight interpretation leadership lens light love medicine metaphor mindfulness mindset narrative perception perspective presence psychology reflection relationships strategy vantage
Self-induced Blindspots
One time during a record snowfall winter, we ended up with a weekend alone. Our teenage daughter had been picked up by friends for the weekend. We decided to head downtown for a nice dinner. We took my car. As I was backing up our steep long drive, looking over my shoulder, the car jolted to a su...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 09, 2026 accountability assumptions attention automation awareness bias choice cognition expectations growth habits humility identity insgiht intention learning medicine metacognition mindfulness mindset neuropathways neuroscience parallels perception presence psychology reflection safety selfworth subconcious
The Myth of Ready
This week, I tried a simple AI morning brain-warm-up experiment at the suggestion of Alex Morgan from The Neuron. I gave ChatGPT this reflective prompt: Share one interesting assumption I might hold without realizing. The response: Sometimes we assume we need clarity before we’re allowed to move....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 06, 2026 action balance burnout clarity contribution creativity decision default mode direction equlibrium experimentation growth healing insight leadership learning metaphor mindset momentum movement neuroscience paddleboarding progress reassessment recovery reflection resilience rest strategy thinking uncertainty
Grateful for Rejection? A Post-Thanksgiving Reflection
If you’re feeling maxed out on gratitude messages this month, you’re not alone. The day after Thanksgiving tends to expose the gap between the gratitude we’re “supposed” to feel and how our brains actually work. That gap is where the science gets interesting. So instead of another round of holida...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 acceptance awareness bias burnout clarity disappointment ego gratitude growth happiness insight mindfulness mindset mood negativity perspective positivity psychology purpose reflection reframing resilience sleep stress
Providing Entertainment in Lane 1
Last week a few things converged and culminated in me taking something head on that I’d been avoiding. First, spectating an Ironman a couple weeks ago. There’s something about being around real athletes who train hard and perform at that level. Inspiring for sure. That swim tho’… Second, planning...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 awareness beginner commitment confidence courage discipline discomfort embarassment fear growth humility improvement inspiration integrity learning mindset motivation persistence practice progress reflection resilience self-talk swimming technique vulnerability
Ask Responsibly
I was thinking recently about how agreeable my AI assistant, Scribbs, is with me. He’s great at coming up with answers in the direction I point him - quick to confirm, validate, or spot what might be off. It’s a lot like those friends we turn to when we just want someone to agree with us. But I’v...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 24, 2025 ai alignment assumption awareness bias clarity confirmation connection course-correction criticism curiosity detective dialogue direction excitement exploration feedback growth guidance humility impulsivity inquiry insight intention judgment learning listening meaning-making mindset mirror oversight perspective purpose questions reflection reframing relevance self-talk
A Ditch on Each Side of the Road (and How to Avoid Them)
Leadership often feels like driving a narrow road. You’re trying to keep the vehicle moving forward, but there’s a ditch on each side that can take you out if you drift too far. Recently I had the chance to moderate an STFM GME Leadership Panel with three seasoned leaders in academic medicine — D...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 10, 2025 accountability balance boundaries burnout collaboration communication creativity delegation development discipline efficiency empowerment engagement feedback focus growth leadership longevity mentoship mindset organization oversight perspective prioritization reflection resilience skillset strategy structure support sustainability time transparency vision
The Power of a Pen: Story and Reflection
Sometimes autonomy doesn’t start with a policy change or a big career decision. Sometimes it starts with… a pen. Last week, I listened to Dr. Jeff Haney, Vice Dean for Clinical Affairs at WSU Elson S. Floyd COM, share a story during a session on emotional intelligence. He described a night on cal...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 22, 2025 agency autonomy awareness burnout choice connection empowerment engagement fulfillment identity intentionality mindset resilience well-being
Power of Conversation, Story and Invitation
A thoughtful reader recently wrote in and asked me: “How did you build the strong relationships you have with specialists?” At first, I wasn’t sure how to answer. My brain went to the tactical: referrals, shared patients, thank-yous. (These are still paramount. Doing your due diligence with worku...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 02, 2025 assumptions collaboration communication community connection consistency conversation curiosity empathy engagement fallibility grace gratitude habit humanity initiative intentionality invitation listening mindset overwhelm participation perfectionism presence professionalism reflection relationships respect support trust vulnerability

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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