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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: reframing

Showing 12 results:


How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?” That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 alignment assumptions awareness beliefs clarity coaching communication culture development dynamics evaluations expectations feedback frustration growth insight interpretation mindsets modeling perception reflection reframing support trust understanding
Two Travelers and A Mountain: Tale and Reflection
Two explorers set out on a journey to find a hidden village high in the mountains. Both were experienced travelers, used to well-marked paths, sturdy bridges, and reliable guides.   They started on different sides of the mountain which strattled two countries. The first traveler was started in an...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 acceptance adaptation agency awareness calm in chaos clarity comparison expectation reset expectations frustration internal shift journey mindset orientation perspective presence privilege purpose reframing resilience resistance surrender systems thinking transformation trial and error
Reflection: What's Left?
A couple of years ago, at the BE Conference in Scottsdale, speaker and drama researcher, Cy Wakeman demonstrated a tool she called "Edit Your Story" to a room of hundreds of women physicians. She asked for show of hands of who worked with a difficult person on a regular basis. (I snapped the phot...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 agency boundaries choice clarity cognitive shift community compassion decision making detachment drama editing emotional intelligence empowerment facts groundedness interpretation mindset narrative next step ownership perception perspective reaction reality reframing resilience self-awareness self-regulation story editing workplace
Polarities Reflection
"I can either run on time, or I can address the patient's needs" "I can either get my work done, or build relationships with the staff." "I can either shirk my responsibilities at work and be there for my family, or I can shirk my responsibilities for my family and be there for work." These are o...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 adapatation all-or-nothing balance binary thinking choice collaboration connection creativity curiosity experimentation false dichotomy flexbility growth integration intersection mindset perfectionism perspective polarity prioritization problem solving reflection reframing resourcefulness responsibility scarcity self-awareness tension time-management venn-diagram work life integration
The Dilemma: Story and Reflection
Many of you have heard me tell how being a great wife landed me in Alaska from Florida in 2007. It has been a fantastic decision. I don't often talk about the fears I had. I worried about moving an 8th grader away from good friends and the sunny beach to an unknown, cold, dark place (the story of...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptation adjustment all-or-nothing binary thinking career catastrophizing compromise decision making emotional growth expansion fear flexibility gray-area identity mindset narrative opportunity options overthinking parenting perspective problem solving reframing resilience self-awareness success support transition trust vulnerability
Ziplining Snafu: Story and Reflection
When we explored Alaska with our 13-year-old before our move from Florida 17 years ago, we made sure to make it adventurous for her. We signed up for zip-lining in Ketchikan among the tall Western Hemlocks. I've never been a fan of heights (understatement of the year!), but I was determined. We r...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 action adventure agency behavior choice courage detachment embarassment emotion fear growth identity internalization labeling mindset naming narrative perception personal growth perspective reframing resilience self-awareness self-compassion self-definition self-talk shame transformation validation vulnerability
"Alaskan Tough" Story and Reflection
Memorial Day weekend was the best weather we've had in Anchorage in quite some time. My friend, Kari, a lifelong Alaskan, asked if I wanted to hike Bird Ridge which starts at the Bird Creek parking lot, a popular moderate to difficult 5-mile 3400 ft elevation hike. I've never done it, although mo...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assumptions attentiveness automaticity awareness clarity confirmation bias correction curiosity expectation humor identity insight interpretation language listening mindset miscommunication mistake narrative observation overconfidence perception preparation presence readiness realization reflection reframing storytelling
The "Right" Tool, Story and Reflection
My husband and I enjoy our annual camping trips across South Central Alaska (Hope being a favorite). We upgraded a couple years ago from the pop-up tent to a trailer. (Yep - we are 'that age' 😉) But we have learned over the years the importance of taking a screen shelter with us - whether for bug...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assumptions brainstorming coaching creativity curiosity discomfort empowerment experimentation exploration flexibility imagination improvisation innovation insight limitations mental agility metaphor mindset obstacles options perseverance perspective problem solving reframing resilience resourcefulness self-efficacy tools workaround
The Tale of Two Challenges
Challenge #1 The Hike. When my kids were both back in Alaska, they insisted that we climb the frontside of Flattop one rainy day. It's a popular local hike. It's my least favorite because I loathe the "scramble" at the top, where you create your own rock climbing path up. It's not particularly st...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptability agency automatic thoughts challenge control discomfort emotions experience fear flexibility frustration growth humor memory making mindset narrative negativity ownership perspective reactivity reflection reframing resilience responsibility self-awareness self-compasssion self-talk storytelling thoughts transformation
"The Plank" Story and Reflection
Most Sunday mornings during the pandemic, I logged on to a zoom call to do strength training with a group of women physicians led by Dr. Ali Novitsky (photo above) or her team of coaches. She combined mindset work with bodywork. On particular workout stands out to me. She told us we were finishin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability all-or-nothing binary thinking bodywork capacity challenge choice coaching discipline discomfort effort endurance flexibility growth incremental progress learning mental flexibility mindset mindset shift motivation perseverance persistence physicality reflection reframing resilience self-awareness self-compassion strength training surprise
What's Missing Reflection
You know those times when two clothing items randomly end up next to each other in the laundry, and you see a new outfit?  No, just me? Well, anyway, I had a similar thing happen as three situations juxtaposed together to open up my thinking. The first one involved a couple of group sessions in w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 automatic thoughts awareness bias circumstance clarity coaching confidence distortion empowerment evidence facts filtering insight internal dialogue juxtaposition mindset minset shift narrative perception positivity reflection reframing self-perception self-talk self-worth storylines thought distortions truth telling validation value
Spring Outside Story and Reflection
On March 6, my husband said - let's run tomorrow night. Our local running store offers unofficial community runs each week. Normally, I'm the least spontaneous person I know - maybe it was his enthusiasm or the sun shining through my Alaskan window. I was like, "Let's do it!" It was a fabulous ru...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptation appreciation awareness change community gratitude growth hope humor identity joy light optimism perspective privilege reflection reframing resilience seasons spontaneity

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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