Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: reframing
Showing 12 results:
Broadening the Differential: A Lesson in Agile Thinking
I've been spending time with colleagues lately exploring the concept of agility in the research literature. And as a result, I keep finding the need for it everywhere.
This week alone, our house build presented a wiring issue that no longer aligned with the original lighting and door-swing plans ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2026
adaptability
adaptation
advocacy
agility
anchoring
assumptions
awareness
bias
caregiving
change
chaos
clinical thinking
collaboration
communication
complexity
contingency
curiosity
decision making
diagnosis
efficiency
execution
family
flexibility
growth
home building
humility
insight
judgment
leadership
learning
logistics
medicine
openness
perspective
perspective shift
planning
prioritization
problem solving
realignment
reassessment
recalibration
reconsideration
reflection
reframing
resilience
responsiveness
rethinking
structure
systems
truth seeking
uncertainty
The Impact We Don't Always See
I came across a piece from Sahil Bloom not too long ago about the “Stonecutter Principle,” which is so relatable to the work I do.
In case you’re not familiar with the story - a quick recap: three stonecutters doing the same work but describing it very differently: cutting stone, building a wall,...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
May 14, 2026
administration
awareness
burnout
caregiving
cathedral
compassion
connection
documentation
empathy
forms
fulfillment
gratitude
growth
healing
healthcare
humanity
impact
leadership
legacy
meaning
medicine
mindset
motivation
patient care
perspective
physician
purpose
purposeful work
quality of life
reflection
reframing
relationships
resilience
service
stonecutter
storytelling
support
values
Marine Survival Weekend (From the Archives)
As a faculty member of the Alaska Family Medicine Residency program, I had my share of teaching during our infamous Wilderness Medicine Weekend excursion. In January, it involved snow cave construction, and in May, it involved marine safety. The first spring, I participated with 2 other faculty m...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 23, 2026
accountability
adaptability
alaska
awareness
education
embarassment
experience
growth
humility
insight
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
perspective
professionalism
reflection
reframing
residency
resilience
responsibility
safety
teaching
teamwork
trust
wilderness
wisdom
What’s Your Fuel Level?
It’s the start of a new year, and for many of us, change is on the horizon.
Sometimes that change is self-initiated. Sometimes it’s suggested by others. Sometimes it’s formally required. In medicine and academic life, change often shows up wrapped in goals, milestones, improvement plans, or feedb...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jan 09, 2026
academia
agency
alignment
autonomy
behavior
beliefs
change
coaching
compliance
confidence
defensiveness
discipline
education
emotions
feedback
fuel
goals
growth
identity
importance
integrity
leadership
learning
meaning
medicine
motivation
needs
ownership
process
purpose
readiness
reflection
reframing
resistance
sustainability
thinking
transformation
values
Suitcases, Constraints, and Where Possibility Lives
Last week, I wrote about a familiar moment in medicine: when you’ve used every skillful form of influence you have (data, stories, coalitions, reframing) and nothing moves. When effort stops matching outcome, (high importance, low control, and your influence stalls), there are a few ways forward....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Dec 12, 2025
acceptance
adaptation
agency
burnout
constraint
control
creativity
energy
flexibility
impact
influence
leadership
limits
navigation
possibility
problem-solving
reframing
resilience
strategy
systems
Grateful for Rejection? A Post-Thanksgiving Reflection
If you’re feeling maxed out on gratitude messages this month, you’re not alone. The day after Thanksgiving tends to expose the gap between the gratitude we’re “supposed” to feel and how our brains actually work. That gap is where the science gets interesting. So instead of another round of holida...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Dec 10, 2025
acceptance
awareness
bias
burnout
clarity
disappointment
ego
gratitude
growth
happiness
insight
mindfulness
mindset
mood
negativity
perspective
positivity
psychology
purpose
reflection
reframing
resilience
sleep
stress
Ask Responsibly
I was thinking recently about how agreeable my AI assistant, Scribbs, is with me. He’s great at coming up with answers in the direction I point him - quick to confirm, validate, or spot what might be off.
It’s a lot like those friends we turn to when we just want someone to agree with us.
But I’v...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Oct 24, 2025
ai
alignment
assumption
awareness
bias
clarity
confirmation
connection
course-correction
criticism
curiosity
detective
dialogue
direction
excitement
exploration
feedback
growth
guidance
humility
impulsivity
inquiry
insight
intention
judgment
learning
listening
meaning-making
mindset
mirror
oversight
perspective
purpose
questions
reflection
reframing
relevance
self-talk
How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?”
That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
alignment
assumptions
awareness
beliefs
clarity
coaching
communication
culture
development
dynamics
evaluations
expectations
feedback
frustration
growth
insight
interpretation
mindsets
modeling
perception
reflection
reframing
support
trust
understanding
Two Travelers and A Mountain: Tale and Reflection
Two explorers set out on a journey to find a hidden village high in the mountains. Both were experienced travelers, used to well-marked paths, sturdy bridges, and reliable guides.
They started on different sides of the mountain which strattled two countries. The first traveler was started in an...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
acceptance
adaptation
agency
awareness
calm in chaos
clarity
comparison
expectation reset
expectations
frustration
internal shift
journey
mindset
orientation
perspective
presence
privilege
purpose
reframing
resilience
resistance
surrender
systems thinking
transformation
trial and error
Reflection: What's Left?
A couple of years ago, at the BE Conference in Scottsdale, speaker and drama researcher, Cy Wakeman demonstrated a tool she called "Edit Your Story" to a room of hundreds of women physicians. She asked for show of hands of who worked with a difficult person on a regular basis. (I snapped the phot...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
agency
boundaries
choice
clarity
cognitive shift
community
compassion
decision making
detachment
drama
editing
emotional intelligence
empowerment
facts
groundedness
interpretation
mindset
narrative
next step
ownership
perception
perspective
reaction
reality
reframing
resilience
self-awareness
self-regulation
story editing
workplace
Polarities Reflection
"I can either run on time, or I can address the patient's needs"
"I can either get my work done, or build relationships with the staff."
"I can either shirk my responsibilities at work and be there for my family, or I can shirk my responsibilities for my family and be there for work."
These are o...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
adapatation
all-or-nothing
balance
binary thinking
choice
collaboration
connection
creativity
curiosity
experimentation
false dichotomy
flexbility
growth
integration
intersection
mindset
perfectionism
perspective
polarity
prioritization
problem solving
reflection
reframing
resourcefulness
responsibility
scarcity
self-awareness
tension
time-management
venn-diagram
work life integration
The Dilemma: Story and Reflection
Many of you have heard me tell how being a great wife landed me in Alaska from Florida in 2007. It has been a fantastic decision. I don't often talk about the fears I had. I worried about moving an 8th grader away from good friends and the sunny beach to an unknown, cold, dark place (the story of...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptation
adjustment
all-or-nothing
binary thinking
career
catastrophizing
compromise
decision making
emotional growth
expansion
fear
flexibility
gray-area
identity
mindset
narrative
opportunity
options
overthinking
parenting
perspective
problem solving
reframing
resilience
self-awareness
success
support
transition
trust
vulnerability
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections