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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: communication

Showing 12 results:


Say It Again
Recently, something happened in a meeting that used to bother me, but now I find it fascinating. I was catching a colleague up who had missed the previous meeting. We had left one decision unresolved: where to place a particular talk. I mentioned the option we had discussed and asked for her take...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 13, 2026 alignment attention awareness behavior clarity cognition collaboration communication complexity culture curiosity decision making distration dynamics focus grace group hearing inattention information insight integration leaders leadership learning listening management meetings message messaging miscommunication neuroscience patience patterns perception processing psychology reflection reinforcement reminders repetition signals strategy teamwork understanding workplace
What Renovation Taught Me About Teams
My husband and I are back in the messy middle of building. We are not a strangers to it. We completely renovated a historic home over seven years and our Alaskan home over ten, with my husband acting as contractor, doing the work he enjoyed and subbing the rest out. And now, we’re building remote...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 13, 2026 adaptation alignment behavior building change clarity co-creation collaboration communication conflict construction creativity decision making development dynamics expectations forming friction group growth homebuilding innovation leadership learning marriage mindset organization partnership patience performing problem solving process progress reflection remodel renovation resilience satisfaction storming structure teams teamwork transformation uncertainty vision
Tools and Strategies
Mindset I always spend a lot of time on mindset. It is foundational and under-discussed. However, if we only change mindset without also learning strategies and new tools, many things will stay the same. For instance, you may have a whole new outlook on your inbox. But if you want to improve comm...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 27, 2026 accountability alignment assertiveness awareness boundaries burnout clarity cognitive load communication compassion conflict decision making development efficiency emotional intelligence empowerment energy management execution feedback focus growth intentionality kindness leadership mindset ownership perspective prevention prioritization proactivity processes productivity professionalism psychological safety reactivity reflection relationships repair resilience respect response sbar self-efficacy self-leadership self-regulation strategy structure systems triage
A Ditch on Each Side of the Road (and How to Avoid Them)
Leadership often feels like driving a narrow road. You’re trying to keep the vehicle moving forward, but there’s a ditch on each side that can take you out if you drift too far. Recently I had the chance to moderate an STFM GME Leadership Panel with three seasoned leaders in academic medicine — D...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 10, 2025 accountability balance boundaries burnout collaboration communication creativity delegation development discipline efficiency empowerment engagement feedback focus growth leadership longevity mentoship mindset organization oversight perspective prioritization reflection resilience skillset strategy structure support sustainability time transparency vision
Quiet Quitting, Nike’s Reframe, and the Real Risk in Medicine
Quiet quitting is no longer just a workplace buzzword. A new study in Family Medicine described how residency leaders are seeing disengagement, professionalism concerns, and strategic “time protection” among trainees. The authors traced this disengagement back to multiple causes: generational shi...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 13, 2025 burnout challenges collaboration commitment communication cringe culture discernment disengagement education efficiency effort faculty frustration generations growth mentorship motivation patient care professionalism quiet quitting rebranding reflection residency selectivity sustainability systemic pressures time protection trainees trust work values workplace
Power of Conversation, Story and Invitation
A thoughtful reader recently wrote in and asked me: “How did you build the strong relationships you have with specialists?” At first, I wasn’t sure how to answer. My brain went to the tactical: referrals, shared patients, thank-yous. (These are still paramount. Doing your due diligence with worku...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 02, 2025 assumptions collaboration communication community connection consistency conversation curiosity empathy engagement fallibility grace gratitude habit humanity initiative intentionality invitation listening mindset overwhelm participation perfectionism presence professionalism reflection relationships respect support trust vulnerability
How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?” That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 alignment assumptions awareness beliefs clarity coaching communication culture development dynamics evaluations expectations feedback frustration growth insight interpretation mindsets modeling perception reflection reframing support trust understanding
The Draft Reflection
At the start of the pandemic, my primary role was in a private practice setting, though I still filled in as faculty at the residency (as I do now). In our group of six physicians and one PA, we were constantly using every resource available to stay up to date on the ever-evolving science—what it...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 adaptability advocacy balance bandwidth burnout collaboration communication community drafting educaiton energy management information fatigue leadership misinformation overload pacing perspective priorities public health recovery reflection regulation resilience resource sharing solidarity support sustainability teamwork trust uncertainty
Reflection: The Adventure of Conversation
I had just turned a group of faculty workshop participants loose to help each other work on short term career goals & to do so by practicing their new coaching skills with each other. I encouraged them to keep their advice-monster at bay. (See Michael Bungay Stanier's The Advice Trap). When they ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 advice trap awareness co-creation coaching communication connection curiosity discovery empathy engagement exploration facilitation growth guidance insight interaction learning listening mindset non-judgment openness pattern recognition physician habit practice presence reflection restraint storytelling transformation trust
Reflecting on Two Things
In preparing for the AMWA Evolve Leadership Course for trainees session on Difficult Conversations, I've been reflecting on principles from Crucial Conversations, Super Communicators, Non-Violent Communication, and How to Work with Almost Anyone (all highly recommended books). We often fall into ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 awareness balance binary thinking communication compassion complexity conflict resolution contradiction curiosity discernment emotional intelligence empathy fool's choice grace growth honesty kindness labeling mindset nuance overgeneralization paradox perspective polarity thinking reflection relationship self-regulation truth understanding wake
Winning Reflections
As we close out 2024, I want to point our minds toward the wins. What you learned, what impact you made, how you grew, etc. You all know it's one area I like to be intentional and savor. Last week, my own coach just elevated the process for me by 1. recognizing something I was unknowingly doing a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 affirmation awareness celebration coaching communication confidence energy feedback growth insight intentionality leadership learning mindset positivity preparation process progress recognition reflection reinforcement repeatability rumination savoring self-awareness shift success sustainability team dynamics widsom
Story and Reflection: Lessons from Strife
During my part of my time as core faculty, I gained many humorous memories and more valuable (even if somewhat unorthodox) lessons. We were a large group (12 in all), and for a short while, the makeup of personalities and dynamics created some unruly situations. Many memorable and laughable lesso...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 adaptability agreement collaboration communication conflict consensus culture decision making emotional intelligence emotional regulation facilitation feedback group dynamics humanity humor leadership lessons perspective process productivity psychological safety reflection regulation relationship preservation repetition resolution self-awareness strategy strife systems teamwork yes-and

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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