Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: growth
Showing 12 results:
Responsibility Revisited: Story and Reflection
We don’t always talk about guilt in medicine unless it’s framed as toxic or as a byproduct of impossible systems. But some guilt is earned. Some of it’s useful. The kind that nudges us when we’ve strayed from our values. And some is not.
What follows is a story out of several that came to mine fr...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 08, 2025
adaptation
alignment
awareness
character
conscience
deicision
ethics
fatigue
growth
guilt
integrity
judgment
learning
medicine
observation
reflection
residency
responsibility
self-correction
values
Story and Reflection: What Success Really Looks Like
As a new academic year begins—fresh name badges, new roles, different rhythms—I’ve been returning to a question I first heard from Dr. Kerri Palamara, a national leader in coaching in graduate medical education and Director of the Center for Physician Well-Being at Massachusetts General Hospital....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 11, 2025
agency
alignment
aspirations
authenticity
awareness
belonging
career
clarity
coaching
compassion
connection
curiosity
fulfillment
growth
intention
meaning
navigation
pause
perspective
presence
purpose
redefinition
reflection
relationships
success
transformation
values
well-being
wholeness
Lessons in the Messy Middle Reflection
“Celebrate the abundance within troubles.” – Will Miller, MD, Annals of Family Medicine, 2010 📸 Thanks to Jay Fetter for the reminder and this powerful slide in Atlanta last week where the year long STFM CBME pilot project wrapped up.
The CBME pilot participants showed us what it looks like to le...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 19, 2025
abundance
adaptation
breakthrough
challenge
change
clarity
complexity
courage
culture
curiosity
design
discovery
experimentation
failure
growth
innovation
insight
leadership
learning
meaning
momentum
optimism
persistence
progress
purpose
reflection
resilience
tension
transformation
uncertainty
Leaders and Legacy Reflection
When physicians or faculty leaders are struggling in their roles—or with certain parts of them—I often ask:
"When you think of a leader you admire, what qualities stand out?"
They usually name things such as integrity. Strength. Clinical wisdom. Courage. Kindness. Collaboration.
And almost always...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
admiration
awareness
balance
boundaries
capacity
choice
clarity
courage
decline
dedication
delegation
discomfort
expansion
growth
impact
influence
integrity
kindness
leaders
leadership
legacy
modeling
possibility
presence
purpose
rolemodeling
streamline
strength
sustainability
tension
wisdom
Confessions of a Former Night Owl: Story and Reflection on Identity, Change, and Quiet Growth
We often resist change when it feels like it threatens who we are. But not all change is self-abandonment.
Not long ago, someone shared that she felt a surprising amount of grief around changing—even when the change was meant to help a relationship work better. Authenticity was a deeply held valu...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptation
adjustment
alignment
authenticity
change
commitment
curiosity
discovery
evolution
flexibility
grief
growth
habits
identity
intention
mindset
motivation
openness
patterns
resistance
selfhood
surprises
transformation
values
willingness
How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?”
That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
alignment
assumptions
awareness
beliefs
clarity
coaching
communication
culture
development
dynamics
evaluations
expectations
feedback
frustration
growth
insight
interpretation
mindsets
modeling
perception
reflection
reframing
support
trust
understanding
Purpose at the Crossroads: Story and Reflection
It’s at the crossroads—between opportunity and discernment—that purpose gets tested.
- A resident deciding between a desired fellowship and staying in a community they love that may not utilize that training.
- A faculty member torn between taking on a leadership role or focusing their energy on ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
alignment
authenticity
boundaries
calling
clarity
decision making
discernment
growth
humility
intentionality
leadership
long-term impact
meaning
opportunity
purpose
responsibility
self-awareness
service
sustainability
team based leadership
timing
transition
vocation
well-being
wisdom
The Helper's Fine Line: Story and Reflection
I usually received good grades and positive comments on my report cards as a kid. However, I received one remark from my first-grade teacher that I wasn't sure how to take. She wrote, "Tonya is sometimes too helpful to her neighbors."
Being helpful is good, right?
I mean, Dawn was struggling with...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
autonomy
boundaries
burnout
capacity building
coaching
developmental struggle
discomfort
enablement
expectations
growth
growth mindset
helicoptering
independence
intention
learning
mental muscle
mentoring
modeling
overhelping
pause
rescuing
role clarity
self-efficacy
supportive leadership
trust
Reflection: The Adventure of Conversation
I had just turned a group of faculty workshop participants loose to help each other work on short term career goals & to do so by practicing their new coaching skills with each other.
I encouraged them to keep their advice-monster at bay. (See Michael Bungay Stanier's The Advice Trap).
When they ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
advice trap
awareness
co-creation
coaching
communication
connection
curiosity
discovery
empathy
engagement
exploration
facilitation
growth
guidance
insight
interaction
learning
listening
mindset
non-judgment
openness
pattern recognition
physician habit
practice
presence
reflection
restraint
storytelling
transformation
trust
Blindfolds: Story and Reflection
For better or worse (mostly better), I'm partly the result of having an older sister.
When we were kids, she had brilliant ideas for games. One of her favorites? A blindfolded taste test.
She claimed it was all in good fun—but let’s be honest, it was her sneaky way of trying to cure my “ridiculou...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
agency
autonomy
boundaries
childhood
coaching
competence
control
curiosity
empowerment
encouragement
experimentation
growth
humor
individuality
insight
learning
memory
non-judgment
persuasion
playfulness
psychological safety
reflection
relatedness
resilience
resistance
self-discovery
skepticism
support
trial and error
trust
Reflecting on Two Things
In preparing for the AMWA Evolve Leadership Course for trainees session on Difficult Conversations, I've been reflecting on principles from Crucial Conversations, Super Communicators, Non-Violent Communication, and How to Work with Almost Anyone (all highly recommended books).
We often fall into ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
awareness
balance
binary thinking
communication
compassion
complexity
conflict resolution
contradiction
curiosity
discernment
emotional intelligence
empathy
fool's choice
grace
growth
honesty
kindness
labeling
mindset
nuance
overgeneralization
paradox
perspective
polarity thinking
reflection
relationship
self-regulation
truth
understanding
wake
Winning Reflections
As we close out 2024, I want to point our minds toward the wins. What you learned, what impact you made, how you grew, etc. You all know it's one area I like to be intentional and savor.
Last week, my own coach just elevated the process for me by 1. recognizing something I was unknowingly doing a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
affirmation
awareness
celebration
coaching
communication
confidence
energy
feedback
growth
insight
intentionality
leadership
learning
mindset
positivity
preparation
process
progress
recognition
reflection
reinforcement
repeatability
rumination
savoring
self-awareness
shift
success
sustainability
team dynamics
widsom
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
