Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: growth
Showing 12 results:
Learning As We Go
We’re in the thick of our Washington build, and I’ve lost count of how many times the plan has had to change on a dime.
Not many major ones. But what feels like a near-constant set of pivots. Inspection corrections. New ideas. The domino effect of one decision making another no longer feasible.
A...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 24, 2026
adaptability
adjustment
ai
awareness
balance
change
coaching
cognition
consistency
decision making
development
education
efficiency
flexibility
framework
future
growth
improvement
innovation
insight
iteration
leadership
learning
medicine
mindset
planning
problem solving
progress
reasoning
reflection
residency
resilience
skills
strategy
teaching
technology
thinking
transformation
A Christmas Epiphany (From the Archives)
Early in our marriage, we lived in an ongoing renovation of a historic home. It had an entryway with stairs wrapping up to the second floor, creating the ideal spot for our Christmas tree. We would take the girls to the tree farm and pick out the largest one with near-perfect branches and set it ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 23, 2026
adaptation
awareness
balance
behavior
calm
change
clarity
cognition
communication
conflict
connection
control
emotion
environment
family
growth
habits
holidays
influence
innner dialogue
joy
marriage
mindset
narrative
perfectionism
perspective
psychology
reflection
regulation
relationships
resilience
self awareness
soundtracks
stress
thinking
traditions
trigger
wellbeing
Two Kinds of Motivation
I had the chance to host Dr Tyra Fainstad (University of Colorado, Better Together Coaching Founder) for a group coaching session on mindset, and she opened with Self-Determination Theory (SDT).
I've loved the topic of SDT since hearing Dr Richard Ryan speak at the IOC Coaching in Leadership and ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 23, 2026
autonomy
awareness
behavior
burnout
capability
choice
clarity
coaching
cognition
competence
connection
development
educaiton
emotions
engagement
extrinsic
focus
growth
habits
innercritic
intrinsic
introjects
leadership
learning
medicine
mindset
motivation
performance
physician
psychology
purpose
reflection
relatedness
resilience
self-determination
thinking
values
wellbeing
What the Critic Taught Me
I was talking with a physician recently who started his own practice.
Someone had asked about him in a local Facebook group. There were about thirty responses. Not just “he’s good,” but detailed, generous paragraphs about his skill, empathy, time, and care.
And then one line:
“My mom saw him and ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 23, 2026
adaptability
attention
awareness
beliefs
boundaries
burnout
coaching
comparison
confidence
criticism
delegation
development
emotions
empathy
feeback
focus
grace
growth
identity
improvement
interpretation
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
mindset
narrative
perspective
physician
practice
purpose
reflection
reputation
resilience
reviews
selfworth
trigger
validation
values
wellbeing
Don't Game Tape Alone
Last week, I was sitting in a hotel conference room in Chicago at the AMA Precision Medicine Conference listening to Dr. Lara Varpio from the Perelman School of Medicine talk about agency. Not the vague "you have more power than you think" kind, but the research kind.
She offered four of the six ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 04, 2026
advising
agency
awareness
coaching
collaboration
communication
connection
constraints
conversation
culture
data
development
discursive
education
empowerment
faculty
feedback
growth
guidance
improvement
insight
leadership
learning
meaning
medicine
mentorship
mindset
partnership
performance
practice
reflection
relational
relationships
residency
self-awareness
support
systemic
systems
temporal
transformation
trust
Childhood Courage
In our early days as a family with one car, my husband's boss would pick him up for work up on a motorcycle. He kept the spare helmet at our house. Our oldest, a toddler at the time, had an instinctual and intense fear of the helmet -- even when Mark was wearing it (wise beyond her years?). This ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 18, 2026
action
behavior
bravery
breakthrough
challenge
change
childhood
coaching
comfort-zone
confidence
courage
determination
development
empowerment
family
fear
fearlessness
future
goal-setting
growth
habits
inspiration
learning
life-lessons
mindfulness
mindset
motivation
overcoming
parenting
personal-growth
progress
psychology
reflection
resilience
reward
risk
self-growth
storytelling
success
transformation
vision
What Renovation Taught Me About Teams
My husband and I are back in the messy middle of building.
We are not a strangers to it. We completely renovated a historic home over seven years and our Alaskan home over ten, with my husband acting as contractor, doing the work he enjoyed and subbing the rest out.
And now, we’re building remote...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 13, 2026
adaptation
alignment
behavior
building
change
clarity
co-creation
collaboration
communication
conflict
construction
creativity
decision making
development
dynamics
expectations
forming
friction
group
growth
homebuilding
innovation
leadership
learning
marriage
mindset
organization
partnership
patience
performing
problem solving
process
progress
reflection
remodel
renovation
resilience
satisfaction
storming
structure
teams
teamwork
transformation
uncertainty
vision
Tools and Strategies
Mindset
I always spend a lot of time on mindset. It is foundational and under-discussed. However, if we only change mindset without also learning strategies and new tools, many things will stay the same.
For instance, you may have a whole new outlook on your inbox. But if you want to improve comm...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 27, 2026
accountability
alignment
assertiveness
awareness
boundaries
burnout
clarity
cognitive load
communication
compassion
conflict
decision making
development
efficiency
emotional intelligence
empowerment
energy management
execution
feedback
focus
growth
intentionality
kindness
leadership
mindset
ownership
perspective
prevention
prioritization
proactivity
processes
productivity
professionalism
psychological safety
reactivity
reflection
relationships
repair
resilience
respect
response
sbar
self-efficacy
self-leadership
self-regulation
strategy
structure
systems
triage
Marine Survival Weekend (From the Archives)
As a faculty member of the Alaska Family Medicine Residency program, I had my share of teaching during our infamous Wilderness Medicine Weekend excursion. In January, it involved snow cave construction, and in May, it involved marine safety. The first spring, I participated with 2 other faculty m...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 23, 2026
accountability
adaptability
alaska
awareness
education
embarassment
experience
growth
humility
insight
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
perspective
professionalism
reflection
reframing
residency
resilience
responsibility
safety
teaching
teamwork
trust
wilderness
wisdom
Same Game, Different Frame
Two men played chess a few evenings near the main path before dinner. It was entertaining to pass by and see them deep in strategic concentration.
One night, two photos were taken about twenty minutes apart from different angles.
In the first, the light, sky, and ocean make it feel expansive. So ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 21, 2026
aperture
awareness
chess
contrast
curiosity
discourse
empathy
flexibility
framing
gratitude
growth
humility
insight
interpretation
leadership
lens
light
love
medicine
metaphor
mindfulness
mindset
narrative
perception
perspective
presence
psychology
reflection
relationships
strategy
vantage
Beauty and Belonging Discovered After Change (From the Archives)
When we moved from Florida to Alaska in 2007, it wasn't necessarily a big hit with our teenage girls. My oldest moved off to college saying she would visit us but she wasn't "moving out of the country." My youngest, was about to start 8th grade and had strong opinions about leaving her friends an...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 18, 2026
acceptance
adaptation
adolescence
alaska
awareness
beauty
belonging
change
community
discovery
family
gratitude
growth
home
identity
impermanence
intentin
joy
mindfulness
nature
perspective
presence
refleciton
reflection
resilience
transformation
transition
Self-induced Blindspots
One time during a record snowfall winter, we ended up with a weekend alone. Our teenage daughter had been picked up by friends for the weekend. We decided to head downtown for a nice dinner. We took my car. As I was backing up our steep long drive, looking over my shoulder, the car jolted to a su...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 09, 2026
accountability
assumptions
attention
automation
awareness
bias
choice
cognition
expectations
growth
habits
humility
identity
insgiht
intention
learning
medicine
metacognition
mindfulness
mindset
neuropathways
neuroscience
parallels
perception
presence
psychology
reflection
safety
selfworth
subconcious
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
