Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: transformation
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When an Unexpected Next Step is the Right One
When I began telling people I was considering becoming the Founding Program Director of a new family medicine residency in rural Eastern Washington, the responses were not exactly subtle.
“Are you nuts?”
“Do you need me to say WTF, Tonya?!”
And, perhaps most thoughtfully:
“This doesn’t seem align...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 19, 2026
access
accreditation
alignment
building
calling
career
change
coaching
collaboration
commitment
community
courage
culture
curriculum
decisions
development
discernment
education
faculty
family
gme
growth
healthcare
impact
innovation
intention
leadership
medicine
mentorship
mission
moses lake
opportunity
physicians
primary care
purpose
reflection
residency
residents
resilience
rural
samaritan
service
sustainability
systems
teaching
teams
throughline
training
transformation
transition
trust
washington
workforce
wsu
wwami
Pick Up the Phone
A couple of weeks ago, I was juggling multiple time-sensitive projects when someone began doing work which I felt was mine to do, that I wanted to do, and in an order that made no sense to me.
I initially reacted from momentary frustration.
Becoming a coach does not uninstall the old neural pathw...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 31, 2026
acceptance
activation
adaptability
awareness
breathing
burnout
centering
compassion
connection
creativity
curiosity
emotional intelligence
emotions
empathy
grounding
growth
learning
mindfulness
mindset
nervous system
neuroscience
pathways
patience
perspective
reactions
reflection
regulation
relationships
residency
resilience
responding
self-awareness
self-regulation
stress
transformation
trust
wellness
The River Gets Wider
Just prior to marrying my husband, his dad handed us an article torn from a magazine. It used the imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage.
The gist that stuck with my young mind was:1. Don’t be shocked by the rapids. They’re a natural outcome of two forces merging.2. Marriage w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 25, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
adaptation
adjustment
balance
becoming
career
change
coaching
commitment
confidence
courage
endurance
expectations
flexibility
gratitude
growth
hope
imperfection
joy
leadership
life transitions
marriage
medicine
mindset
navigation
partnership
perseverance
perspective
physicians
preparation
presence
progress
purpose
rapids
recovery
reflection
relationships
renewal
resilience
self-copmpassion
stability
strength
transformation
transition
trust
uncertainty
wellbeing
whitewater
The Bump Nobody Warned You About
A webinar this week about the evolution of a rural residency program inspired this week's reflections. In addition to the successes and growing pains, the thing that caught my attention was the sheer number of changes they had both created and endured.
In just 11 years, the program had 4 Chief Me...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 10, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
adaptation
agility
alignment
awareness
change
change management
collaboration
commitment
communication
complexity
continuity
culture
endurance
evolution
expectations
flexibility
growth
healthcare
innovation
leadership
leadership development
medicine
mindset
mission
mission focus
navigation
organizational health
organizations
perseverance
perspective
preparedness
puprose
reflection
residency
resilience
rural
stability
stewarship
sustainability
systems
teamwork
transformation
transition
trust
turbulence
turnover
uncertainty
Building Impact Capacity
This week I did something new.
I asked Claude to forecast my workload after I entered in all the things from my calendar and everything that wasn’t. It included my coaching practice, presentations, faculty development, travel, writing, a new time-limited leadership role I'll share more about soon...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 10, 2026
agency
alignment
attention
awareness
boundaries
capacity
capacity building
change
clarity
collaboration
commitment
communication
compelxity
decision-making
delegation
design
efficiency
energy
expectations
focus
forecasting
foundation
growth
impact
intentionality
leadership
momentum
organization
planning
preparation
prevention
priorities
prioritization
proactivity
readiness
reflection
resources
simplification
stewardship
strategy
sustainability
sustems
time
tradeoffs
transformation
transition
workload
The Tyranny of the Unfamiliar
Recently, I brought a situation to my coach because I was concerned I might be facing an ethical dilemma.
As we worked through it together, it became clear I was actually on solid ground.
What I was experiencing wasn't an ethics issue. It was just discomfort.
What's interesting is that I've sat w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 26, 2026
acceptance
adaptability
adaptation
adjustment
agility
awareness
calibration
capacity
chagne
challenge
coaching
confidence
coping
courage
curiosity
development
discomfort
emotional-intelligence
endurance
enviornment
experience
familiarity
flexibility
growth
leadership
learning
mentorship
mindfulness
mindset
perseverance
perspective
planning
preparation
problem solving
progress
readiness
recovery
reflection
resilience
resourcing
self-awareness
strategy
support
sustainability
transformation
uncertainty
wellbeing
The Hidden Curriculum of a Career
Over the past several weeks, I’ve introduced you to John, a fictional physician whose story reflects common themes many physicians wrestle with.
He’s a mid-career family physician struggling with a career dilemma I hear often: “I’ve never stayed in one job more than x number of years. I feel like...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 06, 2026
adaptation
appreciation
becoming
career
clarity
communication
community
conribution
culture
development
discernment
evolution
experience
expertise
fulfillment
gratitude
growth
impact
insight
intentionality
knowledge
leadership
learning
legacy
maturity
meaning
medicine
mentorship
operations
perspective
physicians
progress
purpose
recognition
reflection
relationships
renewal
resilience
self-awareness
stewardship
sustainability
systems
teaching
teamwork
transformation
wisdom
John Changes the Question
A few weeks ago, I introduced you to John, a fictional physician whose story reflects common themes many physicians wrestle with. He’s a mid-career family physician facing a career dilemma I hear often:
“I’ve never stayed in one job more than x number of years. I feel I need to leave my current o...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
May 29, 2026
adaptation
agency
alignment
authenticity
awareness
burnout
career
change
clarity
coaching
compassion
connection
continuity
decision making
direction
discovery
engagement
fulfillment
growth
inquiry
insight
intention
leadership
listening
meaning
medicine
mindset
perspective
physicians
purpose
reflection
renewal
resilience
self-awareness
sustainability
teaching
transformation
transition
trust
values
Learning As We Go
We’re in the thick of our Washington build, and I’ve lost count of how many times the plan has had to change on a dime.
Not many major ones. But what feels like a near-constant set of pivots. Inspection corrections. New ideas. The domino effect of one decision making another no longer feasible.
A...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 24, 2026
adaptability
adjustment
ai
awareness
balance
change
coaching
cognition
consistency
decision making
development
education
efficiency
flexibility
framework
future
growth
improvement
innovation
insight
iteration
leadership
learning
medicine
mindset
planning
problem solving
progress
reasoning
reflection
residency
resilience
skills
strategy
teaching
technology
thinking
transformation
Don't Game Tape Alone
Last week, I was sitting in a hotel conference room in Chicago at the AMA Precision Medicine Conference listening to Dr. Lara Varpio from the Perelman School of Medicine talk about agency. Not the vague "you have more power than you think" kind, but the research kind.
She offered four of the six ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 04, 2026
advising
agency
awareness
coaching
collaboration
communication
connection
constraints
conversation
culture
data
development
discursive
education
empowerment
faculty
feedback
growth
guidance
improvement
insight
leadership
learning
meaning
medicine
mentorship
mindset
partnership
performance
practice
reflection
relational
relationships
residency
self-awareness
support
systemic
systems
temporal
transformation
trust
Childhood Courage
In our early days as a family with one car, my husband's boss would pick him up for work up on a motorcycle. He kept the spare helmet at our house. Our oldest, a toddler at the time, had an instinctual and intense fear of the helmet -- even when Mark was wearing it (wise beyond her years?). This ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 18, 2026
action
behavior
bravery
breakthrough
challenge
change
childhood
coaching
comfort-zone
confidence
courage
determination
development
empowerment
family
fear
fearlessness
future
goal-setting
growth
habits
inspiration
learning
life-lessons
mindfulness
mindset
motivation
overcoming
parenting
personal-growth
progress
psychology
reflection
resilience
reward
risk
self-growth
storytelling
success
transformation
vision
What Renovation Taught Me About Teams
My husband and I are back in the messy middle of building.
We are not a strangers to it. We completely renovated a historic home over seven years and our Alaskan home over ten, with my husband acting as contractor, doing the work he enjoyed and subbing the rest out.
And now, we’re building remote...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 13, 2026
adaptation
alignment
behavior
building
change
clarity
co-creation
collaboration
communication
conflict
construction
creativity
decision making
development
dynamics
expectations
forming
friction
group
growth
homebuilding
innovation
leadership
learning
marriage
mindset
organization
partnership
patience
performing
problem solving
process
progress
reflection
remodel
renovation
resilience
satisfaction
storming
structure
teams
teamwork
transformation
uncertainty
vision
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections