Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: self-awareness

Showing 12 results:

Cognitive Dissonance (From the Archives)

Growing up, my world consisted of good kids like Spook, Ryan, Barry, Jean, and Christy. Especially Jean, she would draw fun pictures and write nice things in a note folded up for me at school: "To Tonya, my friend. From: Jean, your friend." There were bad kids like Eddie - who would come to our s...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 07, 2026 acceptance accountability ambiguity authenticity balance boundaries change character cognitive dissonance compassion compelxity complexity conflict conviction courage discernment emotional intelligence empathy ethics forgiveness grief growth humanity humility integrity judgment leadership learning loyalty maturity medicine nuance perspective physicians principles reconciliation refleciotn reflection relationships resilience respect sadness self-awareness trust understanding values wisdom

The Hidden Curriculum of a Career

Over the past several weeks, I’ve introduced you to John, a fictional physician whose story reflects common themes many physicians wrestle with. He’s a mid-career family physician struggling with a career dilemma I hear often: “I’ve never stayed in one job more than x number of years. I feel like...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 06, 2026 adaptation appreciation becoming career clarity communication community conribution culture development discernment evolution experience expertise fulfillment gratitude growth impact insight intentionality knowledge leadership learning legacy maturity meaning medicine mentorship operations perspective physicians progress purpose recognition reflection relationships renewal resilience self-awareness stewardship sustainability systems teaching teamwork transformation wisdom

John Changes the Question

A few weeks ago, I introduced you to John, a fictional physician whose story reflects common themes many physicians wrestle with. He’s a mid-career family physician facing a career dilemma I hear often: “I’ve never stayed in one job more than x number of years. I feel I need to leave my current o...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 29, 2026 adaptation agency alignment authenticity awareness burnout career change clarity coaching compassion connection continuity decision making direction discovery engagement fulfillment growth inquiry insight intention leadership listening meaning medicine mindset perspective physicians purpose reflection renewal resilience self-awareness sustainability teaching transformation transition trust values

Retroactive Omniscience and Having Your Own Back

Over the past few weeks, we’ve been following “John,” a fictional physician trying to sort through the emotional aftermath of multiple job changes and the growing belief that maybe he was just bad at choosing jobs. In the first edition, he recognized the story he was telling himself and how it wa...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 23, 2026 adaptability adaptation awareness career career change change clarity coaching cognition compassion confidence curiosity decision making development discernment evolution growth healthcare hindsight insight intentionality judgment leadership learning medicine mindset perspective physician psychology purpose refleciton resilience self-awareness self-doubt selftrust shame stress transitions trust wellbeing

John and the Honeymoon Effect

Last week I introduced you to John, a fictional physician whose story reflects common themes many physicians wrestle with. He’s a mid-career family physician wrestling with a career dilemma I hear very frequently: “I’ve never stayed in one job more than x number of years. I feel I need to leave m...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 17, 2026 adaptation awareness balance burnout career career change clarity coaching cognition compassion contentment curiosity decision making development feedback fulfillment growth healthcare identity insight intentionality leadership learning medicine mindset motivation negativity bias patterns perspective physician psychology purpose reflection relationships resilience self-assessment self-awareness systems transitions wellbeing

John's Decision

A common theme I hear from physicians is this: “I’ve lost confidence in my ability to pick a good job because I’m looking to leave…again.” And honestly, healthcare is different than it was decades ago when physicians often stayed in one practice for 30–40 years. Expectations, systems, autonomy, c...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 14, 2026 adaptation autonomy balance burnout career career change change clarity coaching cognition comparison confidence contentment decision making despair fulfillment growth healthcare insight intention job search leadership medicine mindset motivation negativity bias perspective physician psychology purpose reflection resilience self-awareness shame stress systems thought work transition values wellbeing

Don't Game Tape Alone

Last week, I was sitting in a hotel conference room in Chicago at the AMA Precision Medicine Conference listening to Dr. Lara Varpio from the Perelman School of Medicine talk about agency. Not the vague "you have more power than you think" kind, but the research kind. She offered four of the six ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 04, 2026 advising agency awareness coaching collaboration communication connection constraints conversation culture data development discursive education empowerment faculty feedback growth guidance improvement insight leadership learning meaning medicine mentorship mindset partnership performance practice reflection relational relationships residency self-awareness support systemic systems temporal transformation trust

Back to Now: When the Clock Stops Judging You

A physician I was coaching recently brought this to a session: “I’m always running late in clinic.” If you work in medicine in this day and age, you know that reality. But as we slowed it down, she noticed something important: ‘Late’ has judgment. The actual data? She walked into the room at 10:3...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 27, 2026 acceptance attention awareness balance calm clarity coaching compassion data decision making efficiency effort emotion focus healthcare insight judgment medicine mental health midnfulness observation organization overwhelm patient care perception performance perspective physician presence prioritization process productivity reflection reslience self-awareness self-compassion stress surgeon thoughts wellbeing workflow

Reflection: Between the Gates

On her recent Dare to Lead podcast, Brené Brown reads an excerpt from her new book, Solid Ground. In it she described ship locks, sometimes called water elevators in canals, and it’s an image that has stayed with me. For those who haven’t seen them: when a ship moves from one body of water to ano...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 10, 2025 adaptation adjustment alignment attention awareness balance boundaries calm centering compassion connection energy equilibrium flow focus grace grounding humanity integration intention leadership mindfulness patience pause perspective preparation presence recovery reflection regulation renewal reset resilience restoration rhythm self-awareness space stillness sustainability transition

Purpose at the Crossroads: Story and Reflection

It’s at the crossroads—between opportunity and discernment—that purpose gets tested. - A resident deciding between a desired fellowship and staying in a community they love that may not utilize that training. - A faculty member torn between taking on a leadership role or focusing their energy on ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 alignment authenticity boundaries calling clarity decision making discernment growth humility intentionality leadership long-term impact meaning opportunity purpose responsibility self-awareness service sustainability team based leadership timing transition vocation well-being wisdom

Word of the Year Reflection

Choosing a word of the year provides a simple yet powerful compass that can guide your decisions, actions, and mindset throughout the year. It's like a quick check-in on your purpose statement focused on 2025. As we step into a new year, take 15 minutes to sit quietly with yourself and reflect. A...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 adaptability alignment amalgamation blending choice clarity coaching decision making direction empowerment flexibility focus guidance identity integration intention leadership mentoring mindfulness personal growth purpose reflection resilience roles self-awareness strength transformation transition values word of the year

All That Jazz Story and Reflection

I'm going to give away one of the truths that throws people off when I play two truths and a lie. I learned to tap dance and even performed on stage after I was a practicing physician. I know, I know - hard to picture. 😉 My daughter was taking violin lessons in a studio that had just started offe...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 all-or-nothing awkwardness challenge control creativity discomfort encouragement expectations feedback fun growth mindset inspiration learning letting go mastery mindset motivation patience perfectionism performance perseverance personal growth practice reflection reframe resilience role modeling self-awareness self-compassion vulnerability

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: self-awareness

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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