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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?” That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 alignment assumptions awareness beliefs clarity coaching communication culture development dynamics evaluations expectations feedback frustration growth insight interpretation mindsets modeling perception reflection reframing support trust understanding
All That Jazz Story and Reflection
I'm going to give away one of the truths that throws people off when I play two truths and a lie. I learned to tap dance and even performed on stage after I was a practicing physician. I know, I know - hard to picture. 😉 My daughter was taking violin lessons in a studio that had just started offe...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 all-or-nothing awkwardness challenge control creativity discomfort encouragement expectations feedback fun growth mindset inspiration learning letting go mastery mindset motivation patience perfectionism performance perseverance personal growth practice reflection reframe resilience role modeling self-awareness self-compassion vulnerability
Winning Reflections
As we close out 2024, I want to point our minds toward the wins. What you learned, what impact you made, how you grew, etc. You all know it's one area I like to be intentional and savor. Last week, my own coach just elevated the process for me by 1. recognizing something I was unknowingly doing a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 affirmation awareness celebration coaching communication confidence energy feedback growth insight intentionality leadership learning mindset positivity preparation process progress recognition reflection reinforcement repeatability rumination savoring self-awareness shift success sustainability team dynamics widsom
Story and Reflection: Lessons from Strife
During my part of my time as core faculty, I gained many humorous memories and more valuable (even if somewhat unorthodox) lessons. We were a large group (12 in all), and for a short while, the makeup of personalities and dynamics created some unruly situations. Many memorable and laughable lesso...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 adaptability agreement collaboration communication conflict consensus culture decision making emotional intelligence emotional regulation facilitation feedback group dynamics humanity humor leadership lessons perspective process productivity psychological safety reflection regulation relationship preservation repetition resolution self-awareness strategy strife systems teamwork yes-and
Reflection: Game Tape
One small aspect of the culture I grew up in centered around College Football. (Stick with me, non-sports fans) As we soon head into the College Football Playoffs, watching Sports Center Game Day with retired coach Nick Saban and former players Des Howard and Kirk Herbstreet is entertaining and i...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 adaptation adult learning analysis clinical reasoning coaching cognition decision making execution feedback flexibility growth improvement insight intentionality learning metacognition minfulness non-judgment observation pattern recognition performance practice productivity recognition reflect-in reflect-on reflection rumination self-awareness situatinal awareness
Performance Reflection
I often talk with residents about what I term "performance mode" and how it negatively impacts us. It's that feeling of playing a persona in order to fit the mold, earn praise, and be accepted. We are socialized as we progress through premed and medical school to look for the approval of others -...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 alignment anxiety authenticity autonomy confidence detachment empowerment essence external approval feedback growth identity impact insecurity integrity introspection medical training mindset motivation perception performance mode persona presence reflection resilience self-awareness self-trust self-worth validation worthiness
Burger Surprise: Story and Reflection
As many of you know, my husband loves to cook and is quite good at it. I had learned to make only two meals before marriage (I avoided the kitchen despite my mom's pleading). But I was suddenly eager to impress my husband with my expanding culinary feats. In those early days of wedding bliss, the...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 communication connection courage creativity culinary diappointment encouragement experimentation feedback fixed mindset growth honesty humility humor improvement intention kindness learning openness perseverance practice reflection relationship resilience self-awareness skill building trust vulnerability
The Youngest Flower Girl: Story and Reflection
I'm not sure every parent of a flower girl fears how the ceremony will go, but my husband and I sure did years ago. You see, our oldest was invited to be the flower girl for 2 of our med school classmates when she was barely three years old. We had many voices of experience say she's too young. A...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 balance big picture celebration ceremony detail-orientation embarrassment feedback focus humanity humor hyperfocus joy learning memory mindfulness mistake negativity bias overfocus parenting perfectionism perspective presence reflection regulation self-awareness self-compassion social cues storytelling worry zooming-out
When the Jacket Fits, Story and Reflection
Once upon a time, as core faculty with various leadership roles, I was unexpectedly summoned to meet with the program director. He said he wanted to discuss my attitude with me. "MY attitude??!!" I thought. I was busting my tail to make the program better. What could possibly be wrong with my att...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 attitude awareness blindspots burnout change coaching collaboration communication courage criticism ego emotional intelligence feedback growth humility insight leadership mindset ownership partnership recalibration recovery reflection self-reflection

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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