Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: curiosity
Showing 12 results:
Power of Conversation, Story and Invitation
A thoughtful reader recently wrote in and asked me: “How did you build the strong relationships you have with specialists?”
At first, I wasn’t sure how to answer. My brain went to the tactical: referrals, shared patients, thank-yous. (These are still paramount. Doing your due diligence with worku...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Aug 02, 2025
assumptions
collaboration
communication
community
connection
consistency
conversation
curiosity
empathy
engagement
fallibility
grace
gratitude
habit
humanity
initiative
intentionality
invitation
listening
mindset
overwhelm
participation
perfectionism
presence
professionalism
reflection
relationships
respect
support
trust
vulnerability
Story and Reflection: What Success Really Looks Like
As a new academic year begins—fresh name badges, new roles, different rhythms—I’ve been returning to a question I first heard from Dr. Kerri Palamara, a national leader in coaching in graduate medical education and Director of the Center for Physician Well-Being at Massachusetts General Hospital....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jul 11, 2025
agency
alignment
aspirations
authenticity
awareness
belonging
career
clarity
coaching
compassion
connection
curiosity
fulfillment
growth
intention
meaning
navigation
pause
perspective
presence
purpose
redefinition
reflection
relationships
success
transformation
values
well-being
wholeness
Lessons in the Messy Middle Reflection
“Celebrate the abundance within troubles.” – Will Miller, MD, Annals of Family Medicine, 2010 📸 Thanks to Jay Fetter for the reminder and this powerful slide in Atlanta last week where the year long STFM CBME pilot project wrapped up.
The CBME pilot participants showed us what it looks like to le...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 19, 2025
abundance
adaptation
breakthrough
challenge
change
clarity
complexity
courage
culture
curiosity
design
discovery
experimentation
failure
growth
innovation
insight
leadership
learning
meaning
momentum
optimism
persistence
progress
purpose
reflection
resilience
tension
transformation
uncertainty
Confessions of a Former Night Owl: Story and Reflection on Identity, Change, and Quiet Growth
We often resist change when it feels like it threatens who we are. But not all change is self-abandonment.
Not long ago, someone shared that she felt a surprising amount of grief around changing—even when the change was meant to help a relationship work better. Authenticity was a deeply held valu...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
adaptation
adjustment
alignment
authenticity
change
commitment
curiosity
discovery
evolution
flexibility
grief
growth
habits
identity
intention
mindset
motivation
openness
patterns
resistance
selfhood
surprises
transformation
values
willingness
Story and Reflection: Mining for Value
Recently, I noticed that a member of our team had quietly pulled back. I knew she had experience—she’d been introduced as someone who had worked with universities, served as a legislative liaison, and helped stand up GME programs. She had consistently offered thoughtful perspectives, often seeing...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
awareness
confidence
confidence without arrogance
contribution over ego
curiosity
deep listening
dignity
drawing out strengths
experience
experience matters
expertise
hidden
hidden assets
hidden strength
honoring the whole person
humility
inclusive leadership
influence beyond title
invitational leadership
leadership
legacy
listening
mining
mining for gold
presence
quiet contributors
reactivation
recognition
relational leadership
respectul curiosity
storytelling
strength
team awareness
undervalued
undervalued expertise
unseen
unseen wisdom
wisdom
Reflection: The Adventure of Conversation
I had just turned a group of faculty workshop participants loose to help each other work on short term career goals & to do so by practicing their new coaching skills with each other.
I encouraged them to keep their advice-monster at bay. (See Michael Bungay Stanier's The Advice Trap).
When they ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
advice trap
awareness
co-creation
coaching
communication
connection
curiosity
discovery
empathy
engagement
exploration
facilitation
growth
guidance
insight
interaction
learning
listening
mindset
non-judgment
openness
pattern recognition
physician habit
practice
presence
reflection
restraint
storytelling
transformation
trust
Blindfolds: Story and Reflection
For better or worse (mostly better), I'm partly the result of having an older sister.
When we were kids, she had brilliant ideas for games. One of her favorites? A blindfolded taste test.
She claimed it was all in good fun—but let’s be honest, it was her sneaky way of trying to cure my “ridiculou...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
agency
autonomy
boundaries
childhood
coaching
competence
control
curiosity
empowerment
encouragement
experimentation
growth
humor
individuality
insight
learning
memory
non-judgment
persuasion
playfulness
psychological safety
reflection
relatedness
resilience
resistance
self-discovery
skepticism
support
trial and error
trust
Reflecting on Two Things
In preparing for the AMWA Evolve Leadership Course for trainees session on Difficult Conversations, I've been reflecting on principles from Crucial Conversations, Super Communicators, Non-Violent Communication, and How to Work with Almost Anyone (all highly recommended books).
We often fall into ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
awareness
balance
binary thinking
communication
compassion
complexity
conflict resolution
contradiction
curiosity
discernment
emotional intelligence
empathy
fool's choice
grace
growth
honesty
kindness
labeling
mindset
nuance
overgeneralization
paradox
perspective
polarity thinking
reflection
relationship
self-regulation
truth
understanding
wake
Balancing Reflection
I received two important pieces of advice once while taking an ocean paddle boarding course. I will cover the first of those today and the other in a future reflection.
The advice: As soon as you stand upright on the board, put your paddle in the water and start moving. It's like a bike - You wou...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
action
adaptability
balance
burnout
commitment
courage
curiosity
decision making
experimentation
flexbility
forward motion
growth
imperfection
learning
metaphor
momentum
movement
navigation
progress
purpose
readiness
reassessment
recovery
reflection
rejuvenation
resilience
risk
self-leadership
timing
uncertainty
Polarities Reflection
"I can either run on time, or I can address the patient's needs"
"I can either get my work done, or build relationships with the staff."
"I can either shirk my responsibilities at work and be there for my family, or I can shirk my responsibilities for my family and be there for work."
These are o...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
adapatation
all-or-nothing
balance
binary thinking
choice
collaboration
connection
creativity
curiosity
experimentation
false dichotomy
flexbility
growth
integration
intersection
mindset
perfectionism
perspective
polarity
prioritization
problem solving
reflection
reframing
resourcefulness
responsibility
scarcity
self-awareness
tension
time-management
venn-diagram
work life integration
Alaskan Pause: Story and Reflection
One fall, 17 years ago, as I was driving in my new state of Alaska, I was in a bit of a hurry (as was a natural state for me at the time). So you can imagine, I was a bit annoyed when the line of cars in front of me didn't move when the light turned green.
The middle lane was empty, so I decided ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
adaptability
assumptions
attentiveness
awareness
behavioral patterns
connection
curiosity
decision-making
empathy
growth
humor
impulse control
interpretation
learning
mindfulness
mindset
misjudgment
patience
pausing
perspective
presence
psychological safety
reaction
reflection
restraint
safety
self-awareness
self-regulation
surprise
understanding
Rumble of Renovation, Story and Reflection
I know I talk a lot about renovation - that's because I have spent no less than 19 years living in three different houses undergoing renovation by my husband - who has a day job! Plus, the experiences are so rich with lessons! So I want to take you back a few years.
But first - Brene’ Brown defin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
authenticity
burnout
collaboration
communication
compromise
conflict resolution
courage
creativity
curiosity
emotional intelligence
growth mindset
healthcare
impasse
ingenuity
innovation
leadership
listening
mutual respect
partnership
perspective
problem-solving
reconstruction
redesign
renovation
resilience
rumble
sustainability
systems change
teamwork
vulnerability
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
