Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: change

Showing 12 results:

In our early days as a family with one car, my husband's boss would pick him up for work up on a motorcycle. He kept the spare helmet at our house. Our oldest, a toddler at the time, had an instinctual and intense fear of the helmet -- even when Mark was wearing it (wise beyond her years?). This ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 18, 2026 action behavior bravery breakthrough challenge change childhood coaching comfort-zone confidence courage determination development empowerment family fear fearlessness future goal-setting growth habits inspiration learning life-lessons mindfulness mindset motivation overcoming parenting personal-growth progress psychology reflection resilience reward risk self-growth storytelling success transformation vision

What Renovation Taught Me About Teams

My husband and I are back in the messy middle of building. We are not a strangers to it. We completely renovated a historic home over seven years and our Alaskan home over ten, with my husband acting as contractor, doing the work he enjoyed and subbing the rest out. And now, we’re building remote...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 13, 2026 adaptation alignment behavior building change clarity co-creation collaboration communication conflict construction creativity decision making development dynamics expectations forming friction group growth homebuilding innovation leadership learning marriage mindset organization partnership patience performing problem solving process progress reflection remodel renovation resilience satisfaction storming structure teams teamwork transformation uncertainty vision

Beauty and Belonging Discovered After Change (From the Archives)

When we moved from Florida to Alaska in 2007, it wasn't necessarily a big hit with our teenage girls. My oldest moved off to college saying she would visit us but she wasn't "moving out of the country." My youngest, was about to start 8th grade and had strong opinions about leaving her friends an...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 18, 2026 acceptance adaptation adolescence alaska awareness beauty belonging change community discovery family gratitude growth home identity impermanence intentin joy mindfulness nature perspective presence refleciton reflection resilience transformation transition

What’s Your Fuel Level?

It’s the start of a new year, and for many of us, change is on the horizon. Sometimes that change is self-initiated. Sometimes it’s suggested by others. Sometimes it’s formally required. In medicine and academic life, change often shows up wrapped in goals, milestones, improvement plans, or feedb...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment autonomy behavior beliefs change coaching compliance confidence defensiveness discipline education emotions feedback fuel goals growth identity importance integrity leadership learning meaning medicine motivation needs ownership process purpose readiness reflection reframing resistance sustainability thinking transformation values

When Influence Stops Influencing

Every physician leader I coach eventually reaches the same moment. They’ve done the work: gathered data, built coalitions, shared meaningful stories, aligned it to the core corporate values, used every bit of their Crucial Conversations skill set, emotionally intelligenced the nuances, and framed...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 acceptance agency alignment boundaries burnout change clarity coalition community connection discernment energy exhaustion frustration influence integrity leadership mentorship metrics perspective process purpose reality reflection regulation resistance strategy systems values

Behind the Blame: Story and Reflection

In medicine and academic leadership, change is constant. But the kind we choose feels different than the kind we don’t. Lately, I’ve found myself thinking about what lies beneath the surface when frustration rises. Sometimes what looks like resistance or blame turns out to be something else entir...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 24, 2025 acceptance blame change clarity collaboration conversation frustration grief honesty insight leadership loss mission purpose reality recognition resistance softening transition values

Freedom Reflection

As we mark Independence Day, I find myself drawn to a quieter kind of patriotism. Instead of fireworks and fanfare, the steady work of building systems where physicians and learners can thrive. It shows up in faculty who pause long enough to ask better questions. In leaders willing to shift from ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 11, 2025 change coaching compassion connection freedom hope interdependence leadership learning listening patriotism reflection support systemic truth

Lessons in the Messy Middle Reflection

“Celebrate the abundance within troubles.” – Will Miller, MD, Annals of Family Medicine, 2010 📸 Thanks to Jay Fetter for the reminder and this powerful slide in Atlanta last week where the year long STFM CBME pilot project wrapped up. The CBME pilot participants showed us what it looks like to le...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 19, 2025 abundance adaptation breakthrough challenge change clarity complexity courage culture curiosity design discovery experimentation failure growth innovation insight leadership learning meaning momentum optimism persistence progress purpose reflection resilience tension transformation uncertainty

Confessions of a Former Night Owl: Story and Reflection on Identity, Change, and Quiet Growth

We often resist change when it feels like it threatens who we are. But not all change is self-abandonment. Not long ago, someone shared that she felt a surprising amount of grief around changing—even when the change was meant to help a relationship work better. Authenticity was a deeply held valu...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 adaptation adjustment alignment authenticity change commitment curiosity discovery evolution flexibility grief growth habits identity intention mindset motivation openness patterns resistance selfhood surprises transformation values willingness

Near Miss Story and Reflection

Many years ago, as a second-year medical student, I stopped by the post office on my way to pathology to mail a certified letter. I had to take a different route than usual - one I knew well because it was my evening route for my study group. It was already 90 degrees with max humidity upon my ar...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 11, 2025 adaptation automation awareness behavior change change cognitive load compassion course correction grace growth habit humanity humility intentionality judgment learning memory mindfulness mistake neuropathways neuroplasticity patterning progress reflection resilience rewiring routine self-forgiveness self-regulation

Anniversaries and Analogies Reflection

Just prior to marrying the man in this photo (throwback to big hair 😂), his dad handed us an article torn out of a magazine. It used comparative imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage. The takeaway gist in my young mind was 1. Don't be shocked by the rapids, which are a natura...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptation celebration challenge change curiosity emotions endurance evolution forewarning growth imposter syndrome journey marriage metaphor mindset navigation partnership perspective phases preparation reflection relationships resilience self-doubt support transformation transition uncertainty whitewater

When the Jacket Fits, Story and Reflection

Once upon a time, as core faculty with various leadership roles, I was unexpectedly summoned to meet with the program director. He said he wanted to discuss my attitude with me. "MY attitude??!!" I thought. I was busting my tail to make the program better. What could possibly be wrong with my att...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 attitude awareness blindspots burnout change coaching collaboration communication courage criticism ego emotional intelligence feedback growth humility insight leadership mindset ownership partnership recalibration recovery reflection self-reflection

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: change

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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