Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: learning

Showing 12 results:

In our early days as a family with one car, my husband's boss would pick him up for work up on a motorcycle. He kept the spare helmet at our house. Our oldest, a toddler at the time, had an instinctual and intense fear of the helmet -- even when Mark was wearing it (wise beyond her years?). This ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 18, 2026 action behavior bravery breakthrough challenge change childhood coaching comfort-zone confidence courage determination development empowerment family fear fearlessness future goal-setting growth habits inspiration learning life-lessons mindfulness mindset motivation overcoming parenting personal-growth progress psychology reflection resilience reward risk self-growth storytelling success transformation vision

Say It Again

Recently, something happened in a meeting that used to bother me, but now I find it fascinating. I was catching a colleague up who had missed the previous meeting. We had left one decision unresolved: where to place a particular talk. I mentioned the option we had discussed and asked for her take...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 13, 2026 alignment attention awareness behavior clarity cognition collaboration communication complexity culture curiosity decision making distration dynamics focus grace group hearing inattention information insight integration leaders leadership learning listening management meetings message messaging miscommunication neuroscience patience patterns perception processing psychology reflection reinforcement reminders repetition signals strategy teamwork understanding workplace

What Renovation Taught Me About Teams

My husband and I are back in the messy middle of building. We are not a strangers to it. We completely renovated a historic home over seven years and our Alaskan home over ten, with my husband acting as contractor, doing the work he enjoyed and subbing the rest out. And now, we’re building remote...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 13, 2026 adaptation alignment behavior building change clarity co-creation collaboration communication conflict construction creativity decision making development dynamics expectations forming friction group growth homebuilding innovation leadership learning marriage mindset organization partnership patience performing problem solving process progress reflection remodel renovation resilience satisfaction storming structure teams teamwork transformation uncertainty vision

Marine Survival Weekend (From the Archives)

As a faculty member of the Alaska Family Medicine Residency program, I had my share of teaching during our infamous Wilderness Medicine Weekend excursion. In January, it involved snow cave construction, and in May, it involved marine safety. The first spring, I participated with 2 other faculty m...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 23, 2026 accountability adaptability alaska awareness education embarassment experience growth humility insight leadership learning medicine mentorship perspective professionalism reflection reframing residency resilience responsibility safety teaching teamwork trust wilderness wisdom

Self-induced Blindspots

One time during a record snowfall winter, we ended up with a weekend alone. Our teenage daughter had been picked up by friends for the weekend. We decided to head downtown for a nice dinner. We took my car. As I was backing up our steep long drive, looking over my shoulder, the car jolted to a su...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 09, 2026 accountability assumptions attention automation awareness bias choice cognition expectations growth habits humility identity insgiht intention learning medicine metacognition mindfulness mindset neuropathways neuroscience parallels perception presence psychology reflection safety selfworth subconcious

The Myth of Ready

This week, I tried a simple AI morning brain-warm-up experiment at the suggestion of Alex Morgan from The Neuron. I gave ChatGPT this reflective prompt: Share one interesting assumption I might hold without realizing. The response: Sometimes we assume we need clarity before we’re allowed to move....

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 06, 2026 action balance burnout clarity contribution creativity decision default mode direction equlibrium experimentation growth healing insight leadership learning metaphor mindset momentum movement neuroscience paddleboarding progress reassessment recovery reflection resilience rest strategy thinking uncertainty

Progress Through Process

I’ve been spending a lot of time lately in complex work with many moving parts: helping design a longitudinal faculty coach training with the STFM CBME Faculty Coach Training initiative, and collaborating with colleagues through an AMA-funded Precision Medicine education grant with GAFP. In both ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 28, 2026 adaptability attention chunking coaching development discipline discomfort focus growth improvement incremental integration learning mastery mindfulness observation patience persistence planning practice process progression reflection resilience skillbuilding

What’s Your Fuel Level?

It’s the start of a new year, and for many of us, change is on the horizon. Sometimes that change is self-initiated. Sometimes it’s suggested by others. Sometimes it’s formally required. In medicine and academic life, change often shows up wrapped in goals, milestones, improvement plans, or feedb...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment autonomy behavior beliefs change coaching compliance confidence defensiveness discipline education emotions feedback fuel goals growth identity importance integrity leadership learning meaning medicine motivation needs ownership process purpose readiness reflection reframing resistance sustainability thinking transformation values

Providing Entertainment in Lane 1

Last week a few things converged and culminated in me taking something head on that I’d been avoiding. First, spectating an Ironman a couple weeks ago. There’s something about being around real athletes who train hard and perform at that level. Inspiring for sure. That swim tho’… Second, planning...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 awareness beginner commitment confidence courage discipline discomfort embarassment fear growth humility improvement inspiration integrity learning mindset motivation persistence practice progress reflection resilience self-talk swimming technique vulnerability

Ask Responsibly

I was thinking recently about how agreeable my AI assistant, Scribbs, is with me. He’s great at coming up with answers in the direction I point him - quick to confirm, validate, or spot what might be off. It’s a lot like those friends we turn to when we just want someone to agree with us. But I’v...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 24, 2025 ai alignment assumption awareness bias clarity confirmation connection course-correction criticism curiosity detective dialogue direction excitement exploration feedback growth guidance humility impulsivity inquiry insight intention judgment learning listening meaning-making mindset mirror oversight perspective purpose questions reflection reframing relevance self-talk

When Justice Meets the Judge

The shadow side of good values in medicine... I’ve learned that even good values have edges. Justice, for me, especially. We talk a lot about values in medicine: integrity, compassion, excellence, justice. But I’ve learned that even our best values have a "shadow side". Sometimes, even justice ne...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 24, 2025 alignment awareness balance boundaries burnout clarity compassion control criticism discernment distortion ego evolution excellence faith grace humanity humility imbalance integrity judge judgment justice learning martyrdom outrage perfectionism perspective proportion reflection responsibility rigidity self-justification

Beyond Labels: Story and Reflection

It’s not infrequent that I’m in conversation with a faculty member who’s frustrated with one or two residents they see as lazy or disengaged. Those moments take me right back to how I sometimes felt a decade ago, when I was burned out in my core faculty role. I remember the intensity of that frus...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 22, 2025 barriers burnout connection conversations criticism curiosity data defesiveness drive efficiency energy engagement exhuastion experience feedback frustration gaps growth immersion interviewing labels language learning minset motivation nuance patience perspective procrastination quality rapport reflection remediation repitition resources responsibility safety strengths support trust understanding

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: learning

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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