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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: vulnerability

Showing 12 results:


Team Culture: Boundaries, Generosity, and Trust
For me, Fall is closely associated with sports. College football, one of the primary ones, but also volleyball after years of being a volleyball mom.   I have a few friends who find sports a bit pedestrian, too focused on competition, and something they’ve never really understood the appeal of. I...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 18, 2026 accountability adaptability belonging boundaries burnout career coaching collaboration communication community competition confidence connection cooperation culture development empathy flexibility generosity growth growth mindset healthcare leadership learning medicine mentorship partnership physicians positive intent reciprocity recovery reliability residency resilience self-preservation sports sportsmanship support sustainability team culture teaming teammates teamwork trust volleyball vulnerability workload workplace
Acting Out of Character
A common tension came up during a coaching conversation with a brilliant, deeply thoughtful coachee. With a lot of diligent work, she has grown more comfortable being and showing her authentic self rather than holding back or becoming someone different for other people’s comfort. Now she is facin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 04, 2026 adaptability adaptation alignment authentic leadership authenticity awareness behavior boundaries coaching communicaiton communication style confidence congruence connection courage development emotional awareness emotional intelligence expression extroversion fulfillment growth identity influence integrity interpersonal introversion leadership motivation performance personal growth personality presence psychology purpose purposefulness reflection relationships renewal resilience restoration self-abandonment self-acceptance self-awareness self-expression teaching temperament values vulnerability wellbeing
Friendships on Purpose
I’m writing from my kitchen counter, sitting on one of the few things not making the journey to Washington: our kitchen stools. Behind me, three people are wrapping and taping up nearly everything we own. They start loading the truck tomorrow. We are down to one drawer, one cabinet, one coffee ma...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 14, 2026 #bemyfriend alaska anchorage authenticity ballard belonging community companionship conference connection courage encouragement friendship friendship building girdwood gratitude intentionality invitation kindness medicine memories mentorship moving networking physicians presence purpose reflection relationships relocation resilience retirement reunion storyslam storytelling support transition vulnerability washington wellbeing women
The Casting Room
I’ve been reflecting on how easily past training experiences (or any experience for that matter) can be oversimplified by those who didn’t live them. It took me a minute to understand why that bothered me. It's because those oversimplified accounts tell a very narrow story of some of the very exp...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 31, 2026 burnout compassion grace healing healthcare humanity humility kindness medicine mentorship perfectionism professionalism reflection residency resilience stress suffering surgery training trauma vulnerability witnessing
Providing Entertainment in Lane 1
Last week a few things converged and culminated in me taking something head on that I’d been avoiding. First, spectating an Ironman a couple weeks ago. There’s something about being around real athletes who train hard and perform at that level. Inspiring for sure. That swim tho’… Second, planning...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 awareness beginner commitment confidence courage discipline discomfort embarassment fear growth humility improvement inspiration integrity learning mindset motivation persistence practice progress reflection resilience self-talk swimming technique vulnerability
Power of Conversation, Story and Invitation
A thoughtful reader recently wrote in and asked me: “How did you build the strong relationships you have with specialists?” At first, I wasn’t sure how to answer. My brain went to the tactical: referrals, shared patients, thank-yous. (These are still paramount. Doing your due diligence with worku...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 02, 2025 assumptions collaboration communication community connection consistency conversation curiosity empathy engagement fallibility grace gratitude habit humanity initiative intentionality invitation listening mindset overwhelm participation perfectionism presence professionalism reflection relationships respect support trust vulnerability
Reflection: Passing it On
This past week, I had the great honor of sitting in a (virtual) room with five individuals who have dedicated decades of their careers to leadership in graduate medical education (GME). The idea for this gathering started one morning when I woke up thinking about how tough leading in GME can be. ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 collaborative growth collective wisdom community connection cultivation honoring humility impact influence inspiration intergenerational learning knowledge transfer leadership legacy longevity meaning making mentorship reflective practice ripple effect slow leadership stewardship storytelling transparency vision casting vulnerability wisdom
All That Jazz Story and Reflection
I'm going to give away one of the truths that throws people off when I play two truths and a lie. I learned to tap dance and even performed on stage after I was a practicing physician. I know, I know - hard to picture. 😉 My daughter was taking violin lessons in a studio that had just started offe...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 all-or-nothing awkwardness challenge control creativity discomfort encouragement expectations feedback fun growth mindset inspiration learning letting go mastery mindset motivation patience perfectionism performance perseverance personal growth practice reflection reframe resilience role modeling self-awareness self-compassion vulnerability
The Dilemma: Story and Reflection
Many of you have heard me tell how being a great wife landed me in Alaska from Florida in 2007. It has been a fantastic decision. I don't often talk about the fears I had. I worried about moving an 8th grader away from good friends and the sunny beach to an unknown, cold, dark place (the story of...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptation adjustment all-or-nothing binary thinking career catastrophizing compromise decision making emotional growth expansion fear flexibility gray-area identity mindset narrative opportunity options overthinking parenting perspective problem solving reframing resilience self-awareness success support transition trust vulnerability
Ziplining Snafu: Story and Reflection
When we explored Alaska with our 13-year-old before our move from Florida 17 years ago, we made sure to make it adventurous for her. We signed up for zip-lining in Ketchikan among the tall Western Hemlocks. I've never been a fan of heights (understatement of the year!), but I was determined. We r...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 action adventure agency behavior choice courage detachment embarassment emotion fear growth identity internalization labeling mindset naming narrative perception personal growth perspective reframing resilience self-awareness self-compassion self-definition self-talk shame transformation validation vulnerability
Burger Surprise: Story and Reflection
As many of you know, my husband loves to cook and is quite good at it. I had learned to make only two meals before marriage (I avoided the kitchen despite my mom's pleading). But I was suddenly eager to impress my husband with my expanding culinary feats. In those early days of wedding bliss, the...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 communication connection courage creativity culinary diappointment encouragement experimentation feedback fixed mindset growth honesty humility humor improvement intention kindness learning openness perseverance practice reflection relationship resilience self-awareness skill building trust vulnerability
Rumble of Renovation, Story and Reflection
I know I talk a lot about renovation - that's because I have spent no less than 19 years living in three different houses undergoing renovation by my husband - who has a day job! Plus, the experiences are so rich with lessons! So I want to take you back a few years. But first - Brene’ Brown defin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability authenticity burnout collaboration communication compromise conflict resolution courage creativity curiosity emotional intelligence growth mindset healthcare impasse ingenuity innovation leadership listening mutual respect partnership perspective problem-solving reconstruction redesign renovation resilience rumble sustainability systems change teamwork vulnerability

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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