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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: trust

Showing 12 results:


Mise en Place for the Mind
One of my coachees recently identified the missing link in his project workflow. (Thanks for the metaphor, Michael Caçoilo! - shared with permission.) He had developed the right structure for him: breaking big tasks into smaller chunks and blocking time to get them done. But something still felt ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 21, 2025 awareness clarity coaching connection efficiency engagement execution focus habits insight intentionality leadership metaphor mindset mise-en-place planning pre-work preparation presence productivity professionalism readiness reflection structure time blocking trust workflow
How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?” That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 alignment assumptions awareness beliefs clarity coaching communication culture development dynamics evaluations expectations feedback frustration growth insight interpretation mindsets modeling perception reflection reframing support trust understanding
Staying Power Reflection
A couple of weeks ago, I had the gift of facilitating a panel discussion with seasoned leaders in academic family medicine — people whose careers span decades, whose influence is immeasurable. I asked them to name a single word or phrase that captured what contributed to their longevity in this w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 belief calling creativity detachment emotional wisdom endurance generativity hope imagination impact inspiration leadership legacy longevity meaning mindset optimism purpose resilience ripple effect sustainability trust vision
The Helper's Fine Line: Story and Reflection
I usually received good grades and positive comments on my report cards as a kid. However, I received one remark from my first-grade teacher that I wasn't sure how to take. She wrote, "Tonya is sometimes too helpful to her neighbors." Being helpful is good, right? I mean, Dawn was struggling with...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 autonomy boundaries burnout capacity building coaching developmental struggle discomfort enablement expectations growth growth mindset helicoptering independence intention learning mental muscle mentoring modeling overhelping pause rescuing role clarity self-efficacy supportive leadership trust
The Draft Reflection
At the start of the pandemic, my primary role was in a private practice setting, though I still filled in as faculty at the residency (as I do now). In our group of six physicians and one PA, we were constantly using every resource available to stay up to date on the ever-evolving science—what it...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 adaptability advocacy balance bandwidth burnout collaboration communication community drafting educaiton energy management information fatigue leadership misinformation overload pacing perspective priorities public health recovery reflection regulation resilience resource sharing solidarity support sustainability teamwork trust uncertainty
Reflection: The Adventure of Conversation
I had just turned a group of faculty workshop participants loose to help each other work on short term career goals & to do so by practicing their new coaching skills with each other. I encouraged them to keep their advice-monster at bay. (See Michael Bungay Stanier's The Advice Trap). When they ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 advice trap awareness co-creation coaching communication connection curiosity discovery empathy engagement exploration facilitation growth guidance insight interaction learning listening mindset non-judgment openness pattern recognition physician habit practice presence reflection restraint storytelling transformation trust
Blindfolds: Story and Reflection
For better or worse (mostly better), I'm partly the result of having an older sister. When we were kids, she had brilliant ideas for games. One of her favorites? A blindfolded taste test. She claimed it was all in good fun—but let’s be honest, it was her sneaky way of trying to cure my “ridiculou...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 agency autonomy boundaries childhood coaching competence control curiosity empowerment encouragement experimentation growth humor individuality insight learning memory non-judgment persuasion playfulness psychological safety reflection relatedness resilience resistance self-discovery skepticism support trial and error trust
The Dilemma: Story and Reflection
Many of you have heard me tell how being a great wife landed me in Alaska from Florida in 2007. It has been a fantastic decision. I don't often talk about the fears I had. I worried about moving an 8th grader away from good friends and the sunny beach to an unknown, cold, dark place (the story of...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptation adjustment all-or-nothing binary thinking career catastrophizing compromise decision making emotional growth expansion fear flexibility gray-area identity mindset narrative opportunity options overthinking parenting perspective problem solving reframing resilience self-awareness success support transition trust vulnerability
Burger Surprise: Story and Reflection
As many of you know, my husband loves to cook and is quite good at it. I had learned to make only two meals before marriage (I avoided the kitchen despite my mom's pleading). But I was suddenly eager to impress my husband with my expanding culinary feats. In those early days of wedding bliss, the...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 communication connection courage creativity culinary diappointment encouragement experimentation feedback fixed mindset growth honesty humility humor improvement intention kindness learning openness perseverance practice reflection relationship resilience self-awareness skill building trust vulnerability
Seat Swapping Story and Reflection
During our 30th anniversary trip, we explored new locales and discovered fantastic small restaurants that locals were trying hard to keep off TripAdvisor. One such gem was in Mainz, a cozy outdoor setting with beautiful ivy over the brick walls and around the fencing. If you have ever eaten out w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability assessment attention awareness boundaries comfort communication composure decision making empathy experience foresight humor improvisation instinct intuition judgment observation partnership perspective predictability protection relationships restraint risk scenario-reading self-knowledge travel trust uncertainty
Team Reflection
I invite you this week to pause and reflect. First, reflect on the BEST team you've ever been a part of. What were the behaviors, characteristics, practices, established culture, and norms made it so? When you've listed it all out, pause, think more, and dig deeper. Second, if this is your curren...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 03, 2025 alignment appreciation awareness belonging celebration collaboration connection contribution culture engagement gratitude growth influence leadership motivation norms reflection support teamwork trust
Grief and Gratefulness Reflection
Today, I reflected on a conversation with a colleague about how difficult it is to lose patients to medical conditions. They work with a population of patients who sometimes have terminal conditions. But I saw their pain through a different lens - that of a family member and friend to people who ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 03, 2025 appreciation caregiving comfort compassion connection empathy end-of-life gratitude grief healing honor humanity legacy loss memories palliative physicians presence reflection relationships support terminal trust wellness

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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