Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: medicine

Showing 12 results:

We’re in the thick of our Washington build, and I’ve lost count of how many times the plan has had to change on a dime. Not many major ones. But what feels like a near-constant set of pivots. Inspection corrections. New ideas. The domino effect of one decision making another no longer feasible. A...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 24, 2026 adaptability adjustment ai awareness balance change coaching cognition consistency decision making development education efficiency flexibility framework future growth improvement innovation insight iteration leadership learning medicine mindset planning problem solving progress reasoning reflection residency resilience skills strategy teaching technology thinking transformation

Two Kinds of Motivation

I had the chance to host Dr Tyra Fainstad (University of Colorado, Better Together Coaching Founder) for a group coaching session on mindset, and she opened with Self-Determination Theory (SDT). I've loved the topic of SDT since hearing Dr Richard Ryan speak at the IOC Coaching in Leadership and ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 23, 2026 autonomy awareness behavior burnout capability choice clarity coaching cognition competence connection development educaiton emotions engagement extrinsic focus growth habits innercritic intrinsic introjects leadership learning medicine mindset motivation performance physician psychology purpose reflection relatedness resilience self-determination thinking values wellbeing

What the Critic Taught Me

I was talking with a physician recently who started his own practice. Someone had asked about him in a local Facebook group. There were about thirty responses. Not just “he’s good,” but detailed, generous paragraphs about his skill, empathy, time, and care. And then one line: “My mom saw him and ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 23, 2026 adaptability attention awareness beliefs boundaries burnout coaching comparison confidence criticism delegation development emotions empathy feeback focus grace growth identity improvement interpretation leadership learning medicine mentorship mindset narrative perspective physician practice purpose reflection reputation resilience reviews selfworth trigger validation values wellbeing

Don't Game Tape Alone

Last week, I was sitting in a hotel conference room in Chicago at the AMA Precision Medicine Conference listening to Dr. Lara Varpio from the Perelman School of Medicine talk about agency. Not the vague "you have more power than you think" kind, but the research kind. She offered four of the six ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 04, 2026 advising agency awareness coaching collaboration communication connection constraints conversation culture data development discursive education empowerment faculty feedback growth guidance improvement insight leadership learning meaning medicine mentorship mindset partnership performance practice reflection relational relationships residency self-awareness support systemic systems temporal transformation trust

Back to Now: When the Clock Stops Judging You

A physician I was coaching recently brought this to a session: “I’m always running late in clinic.” If you work in medicine in this day and age, you know that reality. But as we slowed it down, she noticed something important: ‘Late’ has judgment. The actual data? She walked into the room at 10:3...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 27, 2026 acceptance attention awareness balance calm clarity coaching compassion data decision making efficiency effort emotion focus healthcare insight judgment medicine mental health midnfulness observation organization overwhelm patient care perception performance perspective physician presence prioritization process productivity reflection reslience self-awareness self-compassion stress surgeon thoughts wellbeing workflow

Marine Survival Weekend (From the Archives)

As a faculty member of the Alaska Family Medicine Residency program, I had my share of teaching during our infamous Wilderness Medicine Weekend excursion. In January, it involved snow cave construction, and in May, it involved marine safety. The first spring, I participated with 2 other faculty m...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 23, 2026 accountability adaptability alaska awareness education embarassment experience growth humility insight leadership learning medicine mentorship perspective professionalism reflection reframing residency resilience responsibility safety teaching teamwork trust wilderness wisdom

Same Game, Different Frame

Two men played chess a few evenings near the main path before dinner. It was entertaining to pass by and see them deep in strategic concentration. One night, two photos were taken about twenty minutes apart from different angles. In the first, the light, sky, and ocean make it feel expansive. So ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 21, 2026 aperture awareness chess contrast curiosity discourse empathy flexibility framing gratitude growth humility insight interpretation leadership lens light love medicine metaphor mindfulness mindset narrative perception perspective presence psychology reflection relationships strategy vantage

Self-induced Blindspots

One time during a record snowfall winter, we ended up with a weekend alone. Our teenage daughter had been picked up by friends for the weekend. We decided to head downtown for a nice dinner. We took my car. As I was backing up our steep long drive, looking over my shoulder, the car jolted to a su...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 09, 2026 accountability assumptions attention automation awareness bias choice cognition expectations growth habits humility identity insgiht intention learning medicine metacognition mindfulness mindset neuropathways neuroscience parallels perception presence psychology reflection safety selfworth subconcious

The Casting Room

I’ve been reflecting on how easily past training experiences (or any experience for that matter) can be oversimplified by those who didn’t live them. It took me a minute to understand why that bothered me. It's because those oversimplified accounts tell a very narrow story of some of the very exp...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 31, 2026 burnout compassion grace healing healthcare humanity humility kindness medicine mentorship perfectionism professionalism reflection residency resilience stress suffering surgery training trauma vulnerability witnessing

What’s Your Fuel Level?

It’s the start of a new year, and for many of us, change is on the horizon. Sometimes that change is self-initiated. Sometimes it’s suggested by others. Sometimes it’s formally required. In medicine and academic life, change often shows up wrapped in goals, milestones, improvement plans, or feedb...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment autonomy behavior beliefs change coaching compliance confidence defensiveness discipline education emotions feedback fuel goals growth identity importance integrity leadership learning meaning medicine motivation needs ownership process purpose readiness reflection reframing resistance sustainability thinking transformation values

The Emerging Choice: Staying for the Long Game or Moving On Gracefully

And just like that, it’s 2026! The perfect time for the final piece in a five-part series exploring what helps when you care deeply about something, your influence no longer influences, and meaningful change seems unlikely. Over the past several weeks, I’ve shared a few different approaches to ha...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 abundance academia agency alignment calling choice clarity coaching commitment completion culture departure discernment equanimity fulfillment hope identity influence integrity leadership legacy maturity meaning medicine ownership patience physicians purpose renewal resilience scarcity stewardship sustainability systems timing transition values wellbeing wisdom

Holding Pattern

This is Week 4 of a 5-part series exploring those moments when you care deeply about an issue, and nothing you do seems to move the needle. So far, we’ve looked at three different approaches to that situation: • Week 1: Redefining success when outcomes aren’t changing • Week 2: Navigating real co...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment ambiguity becoming belonging calling choice clarity coaching dignity discernment endurance engagement equilibrium fulfillment holding identity leadership liminality maturity meaning medicine middle patience physicians presence process purpose resilience restraint steadiness tension threshold timing transition uncertainty urgency values wisdom worth

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: medicine

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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