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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: emotions

Showing 7 results:


Two Kinds of Motivation
I had the chance to host Dr Tyra Fainstad (University of Colorado, Better Together Coaching Founder) for a group coaching session on mindset, and she opened with Self-Determination Theory (SDT). I've loved the topic of SDT since hearing Dr Richard Ryan speak at the IOC Coaching in Leadership and ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 23, 2026 autonomy awareness behavior burnout capability choice clarity coaching cognition competence connection development educaiton emotions engagement extrinsic focus growth habits innercritic intrinsic introjects leadership learning medicine mindset motivation performance physician psychology purpose reflection relatedness resilience self-determination thinking values wellbeing
What the Critic Taught Me
I was talking with a physician recently who started his own practice. Someone had asked about him in a local Facebook group. There were about thirty responses. Not just “he’s good,” but detailed, generous paragraphs about his skill, empathy, time, and care. And then one line: “My mom saw him and ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Apr 23, 2026 adaptability attention awareness beliefs boundaries burnout coaching comparison confidence criticism delegation development emotions empathy feeback focus grace growth identity improvement interpretation leadership learning medicine mentorship mindset narrative perspective physician practice purpose reflection reputation resilience reviews selfworth trigger validation values wellbeing
What’s Your Fuel Level?
It’s the start of a new year, and for many of us, change is on the horizon. Sometimes that change is self-initiated. Sometimes it’s suggested by others. Sometimes it’s formally required. In medicine and academic life, change often shows up wrapped in goals, milestones, improvement plans, or feedb...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment autonomy behavior beliefs change coaching compliance confidence defensiveness discipline education emotions feedback fuel goals growth identity importance integrity leadership learning meaning medicine motivation needs ownership process purpose readiness reflection reframing resistance sustainability thinking transformation values
The Tale of Two Challenges
Challenge #1 The Hike. When my kids were both back in Alaska, they insisted that we climb the frontside of Flattop one rainy day. It's a popular local hike. It's my least favorite because I loathe the "scramble" at the top, where you create your own rock climbing path up. It's not particularly st...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptability agency automatic thoughts challenge control discomfort emotions experience fear flexibility frustration growth humor memory making mindset narrative negativity ownership perspective reactivity reflection reframing resilience responsibility self-awareness self-compasssion self-talk storytelling thoughts transformation
Anniversaries and Analogies Reflection
Just prior to marrying the man in this photo (throwback to big hair 😂), his dad handed us an article torn out of a magazine. It used comparative imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage. The takeaway gist in my young mind was 1. Don't be shocked by the rapids, which are a natura...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 acceptance adaptation celebration challenge change curiosity emotions endurance evolution forewarning growth imposter syndrome journey marriage metaphor mindset navigation partnership perspective phases preparation reflection relationships resilience self-doubt support transformation transition uncertainty whitewater
Navigation Story and Reflection
Years ago, my young nephew was carpooling to school with us in my new Honda Odyssey minivan that had my first navigation system. From the captain chair behind me, he exclaimed, "Oh COOL Aunt Tonya! You have a force field?!" It took me a minute to realize he was talking about my dashboard location...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 amygdala analogy boundaries calm childhood control countertransference curiosity detachment emotions empathy forcefield humor imagination inner-peace mindset narrative navigation perspective protection reaction reflection reframe regulation resilience road-rage self-awareness triggers understanding visualization wonder
Fall Focus Reflection
"What you focus on expands." (multiple attributions) I recalled this quote while watching my brilliant friend, Dr. Tricia James, explain how her modification of Stephen Covey's circles of influence and concern applies to us in medicine. The outer circle applies to all of those things that are ou...
Jun 03, 2025 acceptance attention awareness boundaries control emotions empowerment energy focus growth influence intention leadership medicine mindset perspective reframing regulation resilience suffering

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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