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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: coaching

Showing 12 results:


Progress Through Process
I’ve been spending a lot of time lately in complex work with many moving parts: helping design a longitudinal faculty coach training with the STFM CBME Faculty Coach Training initiative, and collaborating with colleagues through an AMA-funded Precision Medicine education grant with GAFP. In both ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 28, 2026 adaptability attention chunking coaching development discipline discomfort focus growth improvement incremental integration learning mastery mindfulness observation patience persistence planning practice process progression reflection resilience skillbuilding
What’s Your Fuel Level?
It’s the start of a new year, and for many of us, change is on the horizon. Sometimes that change is self-initiated. Sometimes it’s suggested by others. Sometimes it’s formally required. In medicine and academic life, change often shows up wrapped in goals, milestones, improvement plans, or feedb...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment autonomy behavior beliefs change coaching compliance confidence defensiveness discipline education emotions feedback fuel goals growth identity importance integrity leadership learning meaning medicine motivation needs ownership process purpose readiness reflection reframing resistance sustainability thinking transformation values
The Emerging Choice: Staying for the Long Game or Moving On Gracefully
And just like that, it’s 2026! The perfect time for the final piece in a five-part series exploring what helps when you care deeply about something, your influence no longer influences, and meaningful change seems unlikely. Over the past several weeks, I’ve shared a few different approaches to ha...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 abundance academia agency alignment calling choice clarity coaching commitment completion culture departure discernment equanimity fulfillment hope identity influence integrity leadership legacy maturity meaning medicine ownership patience physicians purpose renewal resilience scarcity stewardship sustainability systems timing transition values wellbeing wisdom
Holding Pattern
This is Week 4 of a 5-part series exploring those moments when you care deeply about an issue, and nothing you do seems to move the needle. So far, we’ve looked at three different approaches to that situation: • Week 1: Redefining success when outcomes aren’t changing • Week 2: Navigating real co...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia agency alignment ambiguity becoming belonging calling choice clarity coaching dignity discernment endurance engagement equilibrium fulfillment holding identity leadership liminality maturity meaning medicine middle patience physicians presence process purpose resilience restraint steadiness tension threshold timing transition uncertainty urgency values wisdom worth
When Influence Stops Working: Acceptance Without Endorsement
This is Part 3 of a 5-part series exploring what helps when influence has stopped working. Nothing moves. No matter how much skill, strategy, data, coalition-building, or heart you bring. And it’s something you care deeply about. Earlier pieces focused on redefining success and navigating constra...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia acceptance adaptation agency alignment boundaries bureaucracy burnout clarity coaching constraint control detachment discernment dynamics dysfunction emotionality endorsement energy equanimity expectations frustration influence leadership letting go maturity medicine ownership predictability prioritization reafctivity reality regulation resilience sobriety stewardship sustainability systems tolerance wisdom
The Hallway Experience (From the Archives)
I recently heard the phrase “hallway experience.” It resonated with me.    The hallway represents the waiting period after the quintessential 'one door closes' and before 'another one opens.' For me, the hallway period began somewhat nebulously between the pandemic start and formal coach certific...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 17, 2025 agency alignment calling co-creation coaching fulfillment growth identity liminality meaning medicine purpose reinvention transition uncertainty
Story and Reflection: What Story are You Telling?
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s TED Talk The Danger of a Single Story is one of my all-time favorites. She warns how a narrow narrative can distort the way we see people, cultures, even whole countries. But the danger of a single story doesn’t stop there. It shows up in how we see ourselves. The Singl...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 28, 2025 advocacy belonging coaching confidence doubt event evidence growth humility identity judgment lens meaning medicine narrative perception perspective proof reassurance reflection resident retelling story strengths stress supervisor
Story and Reflection: What Success Really Looks Like
As a new academic year begins—fresh name badges, new roles, different rhythms—I’ve been returning to a question I first heard from Dr. Kerri Palamara, a national leader in coaching in graduate medical education and Director of the Center for Physician Well-Being at Massachusetts General Hospital....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 11, 2025 agency alignment aspirations authenticity awareness belonging career clarity coaching compassion connection curiosity fulfillment growth intention meaning navigation pause perspective presence purpose redefinition reflection relationships success transformation values well-being wholeness
Freedom Reflection
As we mark Independence Day, I find myself drawn to a quieter kind of patriotism. Instead of fireworks and fanfare, the steady work of building systems where physicians and learners can thrive. It shows up in faculty who pause long enough to ask better questions. In leaders willing to shift from ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 11, 2025 change coaching compassion connection freedom hope interdependence leadership learning listening patriotism reflection support systemic truth
Mise en Place for the Mind
One of my coachees recently identified the missing link in his project workflow. (Thanks for the metaphor, Michael Caçoilo! - shared with permission.) He had developed the right structure for him: breaking big tasks into smaller chunks and blocking time to get them done. But something still felt ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 21, 2025 awareness clarity coaching connection efficiency engagement execution focus habits insight intentionality leadership metaphor mindset mise-en-place planning pre-work preparation presence productivity professionalism readiness reflection structure time blocking trust workflow
How We Think Shapes What We See: Story and Reflection
When I mentioned last month that I was heading to Las Vegas to see the Eagles play in the Sphere, more than one person responded with a look of surprise, post-Super Bowl: “You’re going to a football game?” That moment—a simple case of mistaken reference—got me thinking about how our assumptions a...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 alignment assumptions awareness beliefs clarity coaching communication culture development dynamics evaluations expectations feedback frustration growth insight interpretation mindsets modeling perception reflection reframing support trust understanding
The Helper's Fine Line: Story and Reflection
I usually received good grades and positive comments on my report cards as a kid. However, I received one remark from my first-grade teacher that I wasn't sure how to take. She wrote, "Tonya is sometimes too helpful to her neighbors." Being helpful is good, right? I mean, Dawn was struggling with...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2025 autonomy boundaries burnout capacity building coaching developmental struggle discomfort enablement expectations growth growth mindset helicoptering independence intention learning mental muscle mentoring modeling overhelping pause rescuing role clarity self-efficacy supportive leadership trust

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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