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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: burnout

Showing 12 results:


The Myth of Ready
This week, I tried a simple AI morning brain-warm-up experiment at the suggestion of Alex Morgan from The Neuron. I gave ChatGPT this reflective prompt: Share one interesting assumption I might hold without realizing. The response: Sometimes we assume we need clarity before we’re allowed to move....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Feb 06, 2026 action balance burnout clarity contribution creativity decision default mode direction equlibrium experimentation growth healing insight leadership learning metaphor mindset momentum movement neuroscience paddleboarding progress reassessment recovery reflection resilience rest strategy thinking uncertainty
The Casting Room
I’ve been reflecting on how easily past training experiences (or any experience for that matter) can be oversimplified by those who didn’t live them. It took me a minute to understand why that bothered me. It's because those oversimplified accounts tell a very narrow story of some of the very exp...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 31, 2026 burnout compassion grace healing healthcare humanity humility kindness medicine mentorship perfectionism professionalism reflection residency resilience stress suffering surgery training trauma vulnerability witnessing
When Influence Stops Working: Acceptance Without Endorsement
This is Part 3 of a 5-part series exploring what helps when influence has stopped working. Nothing moves. No matter how much skill, strategy, data, coalition-building, or heart you bring. And it’s something you care deeply about. Earlier pieces focused on redefining success and navigating constra...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 09, 2026 academia acceptance adaptation agency alignment boundaries bureaucracy burnout clarity coaching constraint control detachment discernment dynamics dysfunction emotionality endorsement energy equanimity expectations frustration influence leadership letting go maturity medicine ownership predictability prioritization reafctivity reality regulation resilience sobriety stewardship sustainability systems tolerance wisdom
Suitcases, Constraints, and Where Possibility Lives
Last week, I wrote about a familiar moment in medicine: when you’ve used every skillful form of influence you have (data, stories, coalitions, reframing) and nothing moves. When effort stops matching outcome, (high importance, low control, and your influence stalls), there are a few ways forward....
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 12, 2025 acceptance adaptation agency burnout constraint control creativity energy flexibility impact influence leadership limits navigation possibility problem-solving reframing resilience strategy systems
When Influence Stops Influencing
Every physician leader I coach eventually reaches the same moment. They’ve done the work: gathered data, built coalitions, shared meaningful stories, aligned it to the core corporate values, used every bit of their Crucial Conversations skill set, emotionally intelligenced the nuances, and framed...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 acceptance agency alignment boundaries burnout change clarity coalition community connection discernment energy exhaustion frustration influence integrity leadership mentorship metrics perspective process purpose reality reflection regulation resistance strategy systems values
Grateful for Rejection? A Post-Thanksgiving Reflection
If you’re feeling maxed out on gratitude messages this month, you’re not alone. The day after Thanksgiving tends to expose the gap between the gratitude we’re “supposed” to feel and how our brains actually work. That gap is where the science gets interesting. So instead of another round of holida...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Dec 10, 2025 acceptance awareness bias burnout clarity disappointment ego gratitude growth happiness insight mindfulness mindset mood negativity perspective positivity psychology purpose reflection reframing resilience sleep stress
When Effort Feels Right
A couple of weeks ago, my friend, colleague, and physician advocate Dr. Sasha Shillcutt wrote something that grabbed my attention: “Can we all stop shaming women who work hard?” It resonated. The pendulum has needed to swing toward rest and boundaries for a long time. We’ve finally begun to norma...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Nov 14, 2025 agency alignment autonomy awareness balance boundaries burnout choice clarity compassion curiosity discipline effort energy expectations flow fulfillment inquiry insight intention judgment mindfulness obligation overload passion people pleasing perfectionism perspective priorities purpose recovery reflection reset rest self-care shame signals support sustainability tells validation wellbeing work
When Justice Meets the Judge
The shadow side of good values in medicine... I’ve learned that even good values have edges. Justice, for me, especially. We talk a lot about values in medicine: integrity, compassion, excellence, justice. But I’ve learned that even our best values have a "shadow side". Sometimes, even justice ne...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 24, 2025 alignment awareness balance boundaries burnout clarity compassion control criticism discernment distortion ego evolution excellence faith grace humanity humility imbalance integrity judge judgment justice learning martyrdom outrage perfectionism perspective proportion reflection responsibility rigidity self-justification
A Ditch on Each Side of the Road (and How to Avoid Them)
Leadership often feels like driving a narrow road. You’re trying to keep the vehicle moving forward, but there’s a ditch on each side that can take you out if you drift too far. Recently I had the chance to moderate an STFM GME Leadership Panel with three seasoned leaders in academic medicine — D...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 10, 2025 accountability balance boundaries burnout collaboration communication creativity delegation development discipline efficiency empowerment engagement feedback focus growth leadership longevity mentoship mindset organization oversight perspective prioritization reflection resilience skillset strategy structure support sustainability time transparency vision
Quiet Quitting, Nike’s Reframe, and the Real Risk in Medicine
Quiet quitting is no longer just a workplace buzzword. A new study in Family Medicine described how residency leaders are seeing disengagement, professionalism concerns, and strategic “time protection” among trainees. The authors traced this disengagement back to multiple causes: generational shi...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 13, 2025 burnout challenges collaboration commitment communication cringe culture discernment disengagement education efficiency effort faculty frustration generations growth mentorship motivation patient care professionalism quiet quitting rebranding reflection residency selectivity sustainability systemic pressures time protection trainees trust work values workplace
The Farmer's Table: Rethinking Stewardship in Medicine
When we talk about stewardship in medicine, it usually means handling precious resources wisely: Blood bank stewardship (don’t squander that O-negative so it’s there in a crisis) Antibiotic stewardship (use the narrowest spectrum possible, so we don’t fuel resistance) Resource stewardship (choo...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 12, 2025 balance boundaries burnout care clinic costs efficiency generosity inboxes listening medicine notes patients reflection resources shortages stewardship strain sustainability time tradeoffs well-being workforce
The Power of a Pen: Story and Reflection
Sometimes autonomy doesn’t start with a policy change or a big career decision. Sometimes it starts with… a pen. Last week, I listened to Dr. Jeff Haney, Vice Dean for Clinical Affairs at WSU Elson S. Floyd COM, share a story during a session on emotional intelligence. He described a night on cal...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 22, 2025 agency autonomy awareness burnout choice connection empowerment engagement fulfillment identity intentionality mindset resilience well-being

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
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