Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: adaptability

Showing 12 results:

I was recently talking with a leader who had navigated a complex, high-stakes situation. We discussed the stress she had experienced. I asked if in the midst of it, she had also felt energized by the challenge. I saw a little twinkle in her eye as she said, “a little.” And so, no surprise, that g...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 30, 2026 adaptability adrenaline appraisal awareness capacity challenge challenge response cognitive flexbility cohesion collaboration complexity confidence coping cortisol crisis decision making dhea discomfort dopamine education emotional intelligence empowerment engagement fight or flight figureoutable flexbility fulfillment growth healthcare leadership leadership development learning medicine mentoring mindset motivation neuroscience perception performance physiology pressure prioritization problem-solving psychology recovery reflection reframing residency resilience resourcefulness satisfaction strategy stress stress management teaching teamwork thriving uncertainty

Asking a Better Question

One of the most powerful things we can learn is that the way we think about a situation shapes how we experience it. The facts of a situation may be outside our control. (Other people certainly are.) But between what happens and how we respond, our brains are busy making meaning – it automaticall...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 23, 2026 acceptance accountability adaptability agency authenticity behavior beliefs change coaching communication confidence courage curiosity emotional intelligence emotions empathy empowerments graciousness growth identity influence intention judgment leadership mindfulness mindset personal growth perspective processing professionalism purpose reflection relationships resilience response self-awareness self-development self-judgment thoughts transformation values

Part Two: Damage and Discovery

Among the casualties of our move was a beautiful glass hourglass that normally sits on my desk. It was a small, beautiful thing, given to me by a friend and doing exactly what it was supposed to do – beautifully measure time. I think it's great comedic timing that the (now shattered) hourglass sh...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 09, 2026 acceptance adaptability aftermath balance caregiving challenges change chaos collaboration community construction damage delegation discovery disruption endurance exhaustion family flexibility gratitude healing imperfection leadership life logistics moving opportunity organization overwhelm patience perseverance perspective planning preparation priorities productivity recovery reflection relocation resilience setbacks stress support teamwor time trtansition uncertainty work

Preparing for Storms, Part 1

I’m writing this on Tuesday morning, September 22, before the storm hits. To be clear, the actual weather here in Central Washington is supposed to be pretty perfect. I mean all the things. Tuesday night: Husband arrives from Alaska. Furniture moving and construction-site Tetris begins. Wednesday...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Oct 02, 2026 acceptance adaptability change chaos construction control courage endurance expectations faith family flexibility furniture growth home hope hurricane imperfection letting-go moving overwhelm patience perseverance perspective planning plywood preparation preparedness priorities readiness reality reflection relocation resilience resourcefulness responsibility storms supplkies surrender transition trust uncertainty unpacking vulnerability

Team Culture: Boundaries, Generosity, and Trust

For me, Fall is closely associated with sports. College football, one of the primary ones, but also volleyball after years of being a volleyball mom. I have a few friends who find sports a bit pedestrian, too focused on competition, and something they’ve never really understood the appeal of. I...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 18, 2026 accountability adaptability belonging boundaries burnout career coaching collaboration communication community competition confidence connection cooperation culture development empathy flexibility generosity growth growth mindset healthcare leadership learning medicine mentorship partnership physicians positive intent reciprocity recovery reliability residency resilience self-preservation sports sportsmanship support sustainability team culture teaming teammates teamwork trust volleyball vulnerability workload workplace

Brads Over Lectures

When our youngest daughter was about four, she was watching my husband rescreen a door. She stood there studying what he was doing and asked, “What’s that, Dad? Are you putting in brads, Dad?” I remember thinking, What’s a brad? She knew because she had spent a lot of time following her dad aroun...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 11, 2026 adaptability apprenticeship coaching collaboration confidence creativity curiosity development discovery education engagement experience exploration figureoutable gme growth healthcare independence initiative inquiry leadership learning learning by doing medicine mentorship modeling observation parenting persistence physicians practice problem solving reflection residency resilience resourcefulness teaching training

Acting Out of Character

A common tension came up during a coaching conversation with a brilliant, deeply thoughtful coachee. With a lot of diligent work, she has grown more comfortable being and showing her authentic self rather than holding back or becoming someone different for other people’s comfort. Now she is facin...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 04, 2026 adaptability adaptation alignment authentic leadership authenticity awareness behavior boundaries coaching communicaiton communication style confidence congruence connection courage development emotional awareness emotional intelligence expression extroversion fulfillment growth identity influence integrity interpersonal introversion leadership motivation performance personal growth personality presence psychology purpose purposefulness reflection relationships renewal resilience restoration self-abandonment self-acceptance self-awareness self-expression teaching temperament values vulnerability wellbeing

Pick Up the Phone

A couple of weeks ago, I was juggling multiple time-sensitive projects when someone began doing work which I felt was mine to do, that I wanted to do, and in an order that made no sense to me. I initially reacted from momentary frustration. Becoming a coach does not uninstall the old neural pathw...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 31, 2026 acceptance activation adaptability awareness breathing burnout centering compassion connection creativity curiosity emotional intelligence emotions empathy grounding growth learning mindfulness mindset nervous system neuroscience pathways patience perspective reactions reflection regulation relationships residency resilience responding self-awareness self-regulation stress transformation trust wellness

The River Gets Wider

Just prior to marrying my husband, his dad handed us an article torn from a magazine. It used the imagery of two rivers coming together to describe marriage. The gist that stuck with my young mind was:1. Don’t be shocked by the rapids. They’re a natural outcome of two forces merging.2. Marriage w...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 25, 2026 acceptance adaptability adaptation adjustment balance becoming career change coaching commitment confidence courage endurance expectations flexibility gratitude growth hope imperfection joy leadership life transitions marriage medicine mindset navigation partnership perseverance perspective physicians preparation presence progress purpose rapids recovery reflection relationships renewal resilience self-copmpassion stability strength transformation transition trust uncertainty wellbeing whitewater

The Bump Nobody Warned You About

A webinar this week about the evolution of a rural residency program inspired this week's reflections. In addition to the successes and growing pains, the thing that caught my attention was the sheer number of changes they had both created and endured. In just 11 years, the program had 4 Chief Me...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 10, 2026 acceptance adaptability adaptation agility alignment awareness change change management collaboration commitment communication complexity continuity culture endurance evolution expectations flexibility growth healthcare innovation leadership leadership development medicine mindset mission mission focus navigation organizational health organizations perseverance perspective preparedness puprose reflection residency resilience rural stability stewarship sustainability systems teamwork transformation transition trust turbulence turnover uncertainty

The Tyranny of the Unfamiliar

Recently, I brought a situation to my coach because I was concerned I might be facing an ethical dilemma. As we worked through it together, it became clear I was actually on solid ground. What I was experiencing wasn't an ethics issue. It was just discomfort. What's interesting is that I've sat w...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 26, 2026 acceptance adaptability adaptation adjustment agility awareness calibration capacity chagne challenge coaching confidence coping courage curiosity development discomfort emotional-intelligence endurance enviornment experience familiarity flexibility growth leadership learning mentorship mindfulness mindset perseverance perspective planning preparation problem solving progress readiness recovery reflection resilience resourcing self-awareness strategy support sustainability transformation uncertainty wellbeing

Broadening the Differential: A Lesson in Agile Thinking

I've been spending time with colleagues lately exploring the concept of agility in the research literature. And as a result, I keep finding the need for it everywhere. This week alone, our house build presented a wiring issue that no longer aligned with the original lighting and door-swing plans ...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 12, 2026 adaptability adaptation advocacy agility anchoring assumptions awareness bias caregiving change chaos clinical thinking collaboration communication complexity contingency curiosity decision making diagnosis efficiency execution family flexibility growth home building humility insight judgment leadership learning logistics medicine openness perspective perspective shift planning prioritization problem solving realignment reassessment recalibration reconsideration reflection reframing resilience responsiveness rethinking structure systems truth seeking uncertainty

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Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: adaptability

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

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