Stories & Reflections from a Family Medicine Physician Coach

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: healthcare

Showing 12 results:

Team Culture: Boundaries, Generosity, and Trust

For me, Fall is closely associated with sports. College football, one of the primary ones, but also volleyball after years of being a volleyball mom. I have a few friends who find sports a bit pedestrian, too focused on competition, and something they’ve never really understood the appeal of. I...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 18, 2026 accountability adaptability belonging boundaries burnout career coaching collaboration communication community competition confidence connection cooperation culture development empathy flexibility generosity growth growth mindset healthcare leadership learning medicine mentorship partnership physicians positive intent reciprocity recovery reliability residency resilience self-preservation sports sportsmanship support sustainability team culture teaming teammates teamwork trust volleyball vulnerability workload workplace

Brads Over Lectures

When our youngest daughter was about four, she was watching my husband rescreen a door. She stood there studying what he was doing and asked, “What’s that, Dad? Are you putting in brads, Dad?” I remember thinking, What’s a brad? She knew because she had spent a lot of time following her dad aroun...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Sep 11, 2026 adaptability apprenticeship coaching collaboration confidence creativity curiosity development discovery education engagement experience exploration figureoutable gme growth healthcare independence initiative inquiry leadership learning learning by doing medicine mentorship modeling observation parenting persistence physicians practice problem solving reflection residency resilience resourcefulness teaching training

Caring Enough to Tell the Truth

I’ve been reflecting on a situation someone close to me recently faced in her work as a consultant. She was brought into a high-stakes situation by her boss, who had asked her to help a close friend. The friend believed that other people involved in an important transition were the problem. Her a...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 28, 2026 accountability advocacy boundaries candor care clinicians coaching communication compassion conflict courage development dignity education empathy evaluation expectations faculty fairness feedback growth healthcare honesty integrity leadership learning medicine mentorship patient care performance professionalism reflection relationships remediation residency residents responsibility standards supervision support teaching transparency trust truth

When an Unexpected Next Step is the Right One

When I began telling people I was considering becoming the Founding Program Director of a new family medicine residency in rural Eastern Washington, the responses were not exactly subtle. “Are you nuts?” “Do you need me to say WTF, Tonya?!” And, perhaps most thoughtfully: “This doesn’t seem align...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Aug 19, 2026 access accreditation alignment building calling career change coaching collaboration commitment community courage culture curriculum decisions development discernment education faculty family gme growth healthcare impact innovation intention leadership medicine mentorship mission moses lake opportunity physicians primary care purpose reflection residency residents resilience rural samaritan service sustainability systems teaching teams throughline training transformation transition trust washington workforce wsu wwami

The Bump Nobody Warned You About

A webinar this week about the evolution of a rural residency program inspired this week's reflections. In addition to the successes and growing pains, the thing that caught my attention was the sheer number of changes they had both created and endured. In just 11 years, the program had 4 Chief Me...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jul 10, 2026 acceptance adaptability adaptation agility alignment awareness change change management collaboration commitment communication complexity continuity culture endurance evolution expectations flexibility growth healthcare innovation leadership leadership development medicine mindset mission mission focus navigation organizational health organizations perseverance perspective preparedness puprose reflection residency resilience rural stability stewarship sustainability systems teamwork transformation transition trust turbulence turnover uncertainty

Retroactive Omniscience and Having Your Own Back

Over the past few weeks, we’ve been following “John,” a fictional physician trying to sort through the emotional aftermath of multiple job changes and the growing belief that maybe he was just bad at choosing jobs. In the first edition, he recognized the story he was telling himself and how it wa...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 23, 2026 adaptability adaptation awareness career career change change clarity coaching cognition compassion confidence curiosity decision making development discernment evolution growth healthcare hindsight insight intentionality judgment leadership learning medicine mindset perspective physician psychology purpose refleciton resilience self-awareness self-doubt selftrust shame stress transitions trust wellbeing

John and the Honeymoon Effect

Last week I introduced you to John, a fictional physician whose story reflects common themes many physicians wrestle with. He’s a mid-career family physician wrestling with a career dilemma I hear very frequently: “I’ve never stayed in one job more than x number of years. I feel I need to leave m...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 17, 2026 adaptation awareness balance burnout career career change clarity coaching cognition compassion contentment curiosity decision making development feedback fulfillment growth healthcare identity insight intentionality leadership learning medicine mindset motivation negativity bias patterns perspective physician psychology purpose reflection relationships resilience self-assessment self-awareness systems transitions wellbeing

John's Decision

A common theme I hear from physicians is this: “I’ve lost confidence in my ability to pick a good job because I’m looking to leave…again.” And honestly, healthcare is different than it was decades ago when physicians often stayed in one practice for 30–40 years. Expectations, systems, autonomy, c...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 14, 2026 adaptation autonomy balance burnout career career change change clarity coaching cognition comparison confidence contentment decision making despair fulfillment growth healthcare insight intention job search leadership medicine mindset motivation negativity bias perspective physician psychology purpose reflection resilience self-awareness shame stress systems thought work transition values wellbeing

The Impact We Don't Always See

I came across a piece from Sahil Bloom not too long ago about the “Stonecutter Principle,” which is so relatable to the work I do. In case you’re not familiar with the story - a quick recap: three stonecutters doing the same work but describing it very differently: cutting stone, building a wall,...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — May 14, 2026 administration awareness burnout caregiving cathedral compassion connection documentation empathy forms fulfillment gratitude growth healing healthcare humanity impact leadership legacy meaning medicine mindset motivation patient care perspective physician purpose purposeful work quality of life reflection reframing relationships resilience service stonecutter storytelling support values

Back to Now: When the Clock Stops Judging You

A physician I was coaching recently brought this to a session: “I’m always running late in clinic.” If you work in medicine in this day and age, you know that reality. But as we slowed it down, she noticed something important: ‘Late’ has judgment. The actual data? She walked into the room at 10:3...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Mar 27, 2026 acceptance attention awareness balance calm clarity coaching compassion data decision making efficiency effort emotion focus healthcare insight judgment medicine mental health midnfulness observation organization overwhelm patient care perception performance perspective physician presence prioritization process productivity reflection reslience self-awareness self-compassion stress surgeon thoughts wellbeing workflow

The Casting Room

I’ve been reflecting on how easily past training experiences (or any experience for that matter) can be oversimplified by those who didn’t live them. It took me a minute to understand why that bothered me. It's because those oversimplified accounts tell a very narrow story of some of the very exp...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jan 31, 2026 burnout compassion grace healing healthcare humanity humility kindness medicine mentorship perfectionism professionalism reflection residency resilience stress suffering surgery training trauma vulnerability witnessing

Rumble of Renovation, Story and Reflection

I know I talk a lot about renovation - that's because I have spent no less than 19 years living in three different houses undergoing renovation by my husband - who has a day job! Plus, the experiences are so rich with lessons! So I want to take you back a few years. But first - Brene’ Brown defin...

by Dr. Tonya Caylor — Jun 10, 2025 adaptability authenticity burnout collaboration communication compromise conflict resolution courage creativity curiosity emotional intelligence growth mindset healthcare impasse ingenuity innovation leadership listening mutual respect partnership perspective problem-solving reconstruction redesign renovation resilience rumble sustainability systems change teamwork vulnerability

1 2

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Tags: healthcare

Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections

Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.

Stay Connected