Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: control
Showing 8 results:
Blindfolds: Story and Reflection
For better or worse (mostly better), I'm partly the result of having an older sister.
When we were kids, she had brilliant ideas for games. One of her favorites? A blindfolded taste test.
She claimed it was all in good fun—but let’s be honest, it was her sneaky way of trying to cure my “ridiculou...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
agency
autonomy
boundaries
childhood
coaching
competence
control
curiosity
empowerment
encouragement
experimentation
growth
humor
individuality
insight
learning
memory
non-judgment
persuasion
playfulness
psychological safety
reflection
relatedness
resilience
resistance
self-discovery
skepticism
support
trial and error
trust
All That Jazz Story and Reflection
I'm going to give away one of the truths that throws people off when I play two truths and a lie. I learned to tap dance and even performed on stage after I was a practicing physician. I know, I know - hard to picture. 😉
My daughter was taking violin lessons in a studio that had just started offe...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
all-or-nothing
awkwardness
challenge
control
creativity
discomfort
encouragement
expectations
feedback
fun
growth mindset
inspiration
learning
letting go
mastery
mindset
motivation
patience
perfectionism
performance
perseverance
personal growth
practice
reflection
reframe
resilience
role modeling
self-awareness
self-compassion
vulnerability
Best Laid Plans: Story and Reflection
I enjoy it when people expand and contrast the meanings of words. It gives me a better grasp of various approaches. I came across a quote from Sahil Bloom that did just that:
"Preparation always beats planning. Planning is based on the expectation of order. Preparation is based on the expectation...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 11, 2025
adaptability
calm
control
creativity
emotional intelligence
engagement
evolution
expectations
flexibility
foresight
grace
humor
idealism
improvisation
leadership
learning
mindset
perspective
pivoting
planning
preparation
presence
problem solving
recovery
reflection
resilience
responsiveness
self-regulation
teaching
uncertainty
The Tale of Two Challenges
Challenge #1 The Hike. When my kids were both back in Alaska, they insisted that we climb the frontside of Flattop one rainy day. It's a popular local hike. It's my least favorite because I loathe the "scramble" at the top, where you create your own rock climbing path up. It's not particularly st...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
acceptance
adaptability
agency
automatic thoughts
challenge
control
discomfort
emotions
experience
fear
flexibility
frustration
growth
humor
memory making
mindset
narrative
negativity
ownership
perspective
reactivity
reflection
reframing
resilience
responsibility
self-awareness
self-compasssion
self-talk
storytelling
thoughts
transformation
Navigation Story and Reflection
Years ago, my young nephew was carpooling to school with us in my new Honda Odyssey minivan that had my first navigation system. From the captain chair behind me, he exclaimed, "Oh COOL Aunt Tonya! You have a force field?!" It took me a minute to realize he was talking about my dashboard location...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
amygdala
analogy
boundaries
calm
childhood
control
countertransference
curiosity
detachment
emotions
empathy
forcefield
humor
imagination
inner-peace
mindset
narrative
navigation
perspective
protection
reaction
reflection
reframe
regulation
resilience
road-rage
self-awareness
triggers
understanding
visualization
wonder
Forced Pause Story and Reflection
My leisurely start to morning clinic with a no-show was short-lived. The kind, new MA took longer than experienced MAs to room patients, which began stacking up. I had almost caught up when I walked in to see another patient. Based on the CC, I was fairly sure this would be my opportunity to "get...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 09, 2025
acceptance
burnout prevention
cocreation
compassion
connection
control
disruption
empathy
frustration
grace
listening
mindfulness
pause
perspective
presence
reflection
reframe
repair
resilience
systems
VW Bug Reflection
For this week's reflection, I invite you to picture a 4-seater car. My friend, Dr Sasha Shillcutt, likes to talk about balancing/integrating life as the driver. You occupy the driver's seat (hopefully!), and then you have one other front-seat passenger and 2 back-seat passengers.
Here's my take. ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 08, 2025
awareness
balance
boundaries
capacity
choice
clarity
commitment
control
decision-making
discernment
energy
focus
integration
intentionality
mindfulness
navigation
priorities
reflection
responsibility
time
Fall Focus Reflection
"What you focus on expands." (multiple attributions)
I recalled this quote while watching my brilliant friend, Dr. Tricia James, explain how her modification of Stephen Covey's circles of influence and concern applies to us in medicine.
The outer circle applies to all of those things that are ou...
Jun 03, 2025
acceptance
attention
awareness
boundaries
control
emotions
empowerment
energy
focus
growth
influence
intention
leadership
medicine
mindset
perspective
reframing
regulation
resilience
suffering
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
