Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: attention
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What the Critic Taught Me
I was talking with a physician recently who started his own practice.
Someone had asked about him in a local Facebook group. There were about thirty responses. Not just “he’s good,” but detailed, generous paragraphs about his skill, empathy, time, and care.
And then one line:
“My mom saw him and ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Apr 23, 2026
adaptability
attention
awareness
beliefs
boundaries
burnout
coaching
comparison
confidence
criticism
delegation
development
emotions
empathy
feeback
focus
grace
growth
identity
improvement
interpretation
leadership
learning
medicine
mentorship
mindset
narrative
perspective
physician
practice
purpose
reflection
reputation
resilience
reviews
selfworth
trigger
validation
values
wellbeing
Back to Now: When the Clock Stops Judging You
A physician I was coaching recently brought this to a session:
“I’m always running late in clinic.”
If you work in medicine in this day and age, you know that reality.
But as we slowed it down, she noticed something important:
‘Late’ has judgment.
The actual data?
She walked into the room at 10:3...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 27, 2026
acceptance
attention
awareness
balance
calm
clarity
coaching
compassion
data
decision making
efficiency
effort
emotion
focus
healthcare
insight
judgment
medicine
mental health
midnfulness
observation
organization
overwhelm
patient care
perception
performance
perspective
physician
presence
prioritization
process
productivity
reflection
reslience
self-awareness
self-compassion
stress
surgeon
thoughts
wellbeing
workflow
Say It Again
Recently, something happened in a meeting that used to bother me, but now I find it fascinating.
I was catching a colleague up who had missed the previous meeting. We had left one decision unresolved: where to place a particular talk. I mentioned the option we had discussed and asked for her take...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Mar 13, 2026
alignment
attention
awareness
behavior
clarity
cognition
collaboration
communication
complexity
culture
curiosity
decision making
distration
dynamics
focus
grace
group
hearing
inattention
information
insight
integration
leaders
leadership
learning
listening
management
meetings
message
messaging
miscommunication
neuroscience
patience
patterns
perception
processing
psychology
reflection
reinforcement
reminders
repetition
signals
strategy
teamwork
understanding
workplace
Self-induced Blindspots
One time during a record snowfall winter, we ended up with a weekend alone. Our teenage daughter had been picked up by friends for the weekend. We decided to head downtown for a nice dinner. We took my car. As I was backing up our steep long drive, looking over my shoulder, the car jolted to a su...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Feb 09, 2026
accountability
assumptions
attention
automation
awareness
bias
choice
cognition
expectations
growth
habits
humility
identity
insgiht
intention
learning
medicine
metacognition
mindfulness
mindset
neuropathways
neuroscience
parallels
perception
presence
psychology
reflection
safety
selfworth
subconcious
Progress Through Process
I’ve been spending a lot of time lately in complex work with many moving parts: helping design a longitudinal faculty coach training with the STFM CBME Faculty Coach Training initiative, and collaborating with colleagues through an AMA-funded Precision Medicine education grant with GAFP. In both ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jan 28, 2026
adaptability
attention
chunking
coaching
development
discipline
discomfort
focus
growth
improvement
incremental
integration
learning
mastery
mindfulness
observation
patience
persistence
planning
practice
process
progression
reflection
resilience
skillbuilding
Reflection: Between the Gates
On her recent Dare to Lead podcast, Brené Brown reads an excerpt from her new book, Solid Ground. In it she described ship locks, sometimes called water elevators in canals, and it’s an image that has stayed with me.
For those who haven’t seen them: when a ship moves from one body of water to ano...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Oct 10, 2025
adaptation
adjustment
alignment
attention
awareness
balance
boundaries
calm
centering
compassion
connection
energy
equilibrium
flow
focus
grace
grounding
humanity
integration
intention
leadership
mindfulness
patience
pause
perspective
preparation
presence
recovery
reflection
regulation
renewal
reset
resilience
restoration
rhythm
self-awareness
space
stillness
sustainability
transition
Seat Swapping Story and Reflection
During our 30th anniversary trip, we explored new locales and discovered fantastic small restaurants that locals were trying hard to keep off TripAdvisor. One such gem was in Mainz, a cozy outdoor setting with beautiful ivy over the brick walls and around the fencing.
If you have ever eaten out w...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
assessment
attention
awareness
boundaries
comfort
communication
composure
decision making
empathy
experience
foresight
humor
improvisation
instinct
intuition
judgment
observation
partnership
perspective
predictability
protection
relationships
restraint
risk
scenario-reading
self-knowledge
travel
trust
uncertainty
Fall Focus Reflection
"What you focus on expands." (multiple attributions)
I recalled this quote while watching my brilliant friend, Dr. Tricia James, explain how her modification of Stephen Covey's circles of influence and concern applies to us in medicine.
The outer circle applies to all of those things that are ou...
Jun 03, 2025
acceptance
attention
awareness
boundaries
control
emotions
empowerment
energy
focus
growth
influence
intention
leadership
medicine
mindset
perspective
reframing
regulation
resilience
suffering
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections