Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
Lessons, lightbulb moments, and honest reflections from life inside and outside medicine - served with a side of perspective.
Tags: discomfort
Showing 8 results:
Leaders and Legacy Reflection
When physicians or faculty leaders are struggling in their roles—or with certain parts of them—I often ask:
"When you think of a leader you admire, what qualities stand out?"
They usually name things such as integrity. Strength. Clinical wisdom. Courage. Kindness. Collaboration.
And almost always...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
admiration
awareness
balance
boundaries
capacity
choice
clarity
courage
decline
dedication
delegation
discomfort
expansion
growth
impact
influence
integrity
kindness
leaders
leadership
legacy
modeling
possibility
presence
purpose
rolemodeling
streamline
strength
sustainability
tension
wisdom
The Helper's Fine Line: Story and Reflection
I usually received good grades and positive comments on my report cards as a kid. However, I received one remark from my first-grade teacher that I wasn't sure how to take. She wrote, "Tonya is sometimes too helpful to her neighbors."
Being helpful is good, right?
I mean, Dawn was struggling with...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
autonomy
boundaries
burnout
capacity building
coaching
developmental struggle
discomfort
enablement
expectations
growth
growth mindset
helicoptering
independence
intention
learning
mental muscle
mentoring
modeling
overhelping
pause
rescuing
role clarity
self-efficacy
supportive leadership
trust
All That Jazz Story and Reflection
I'm going to give away one of the truths that throws people off when I play two truths and a lie. I learned to tap dance and even performed on stage after I was a practicing physician. I know, I know - hard to picture. 😉
My daughter was taking violin lessons in a studio that had just started offe...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 12, 2025
all-or-nothing
awkwardness
challenge
control
creativity
discomfort
encouragement
expectations
feedback
fun
growth mindset
inspiration
learning
letting go
mastery
mindset
motivation
patience
perfectionism
performance
perseverance
personal growth
practice
reflection
reframe
resilience
role modeling
self-awareness
self-compassion
vulnerability
The "Right" Tool, Story and Reflection
My husband and I enjoy our annual camping trips across South Central Alaska (Hope being a favorite). We upgraded a couple years ago from the pop-up tent to a trailer. (Yep - we are 'that age' 😉) But we have learned over the years the importance of taking a screen shelter with us - whether for bug...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
assumptions
brainstorming
coaching
creativity
curiosity
discomfort
empowerment
experimentation
exploration
flexibility
imagination
improvisation
innovation
insight
limitations
mental agility
metaphor
mindset
obstacles
options
perseverance
perspective
problem solving
reframing
resilience
resourcefulness
self-efficacy
tools
workaround
The Tale of Two Challenges
Challenge #1 The Hike. When my kids were both back in Alaska, they insisted that we climb the frontside of Flattop one rainy day. It's a popular local hike. It's my least favorite because I loathe the "scramble" at the top, where you create your own rock climbing path up. It's not particularly st...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
acceptance
adaptability
agency
automatic thoughts
challenge
control
discomfort
emotions
experience
fear
flexibility
frustration
growth
humor
memory making
mindset
narrative
negativity
ownership
perspective
reactivity
reflection
reframing
resilience
responsibility
self-awareness
self-compasssion
self-talk
storytelling
thoughts
transformation
"The Plank" Story and Reflection
Most Sunday mornings during the pandemic, I logged on to a zoom call to do strength training with a group of women physicians led by Dr. Ali Novitsky (photo above) or her team of coaches.
She combined mindset work with bodywork. On particular workout stands out to me. She told us we were finishin...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
adaptability
all-or-nothing
binary thinking
bodywork
capacity
challenge
choice
coaching
discipline
discomfort
effort
endurance
flexibility
growth
incremental progress
learning
mental flexibility
mindset
mindset shift
motivation
perseverance
persistence
physicality
reflection
reframing
resilience
self-awareness
self-compassion
strength training
surprise
Costly Lunch Laughs, Story and Reflection
Back in 2003, I was with four friends in Germany. We ducked into a diner for lunch. The two guys were just hilarious. Their dry sense of humor and perfect timing had us laughing so hard we could barely catch our breaths - literally for my friend Cheryl. 😳
She inhaled food upon laughing, and then ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 10, 2025
action
adrenaline
amygdala
bravery
compassion
courage
decision making
discomfort
doubt
fear
freeze response
growth
hesitation
humor
inner conflict
instinct
intuition
knowing
leadership
ownership
paradox
presene
pressure
reaction
reflection
rescue
responsibility
self-trust
urgency
vulnerability
Optional Suffering
This week I invite you to look for one area of optional suffering you may want to address.
That is one in which you allow your mind to automatically go. I experienced it firsthand after a bike crash left me with broken ribs. (There's not even a cool story to go along with it - I just make a rash ...
by Dr. Tonya Caylor —
Jun 08, 2025
acceptance
awareness
change
clarity
compassion
discomfort
distress
emotion
focus
habits
healing
mindfulness
perspective
presence
reflection
regulation
relief
resilience
suffering
thoughts
Joy in Family Medicine – Stories & Reflections
