Optional Suffering

This week I invite you to look for one area of optional suffering you may want to address.

That is one in which you allow your mind to automatically go. I experienced it firsthand after a bike crash left me with broken ribs. (There's not even a cool story to go along with it - I just make a rash decision to get out of the way of a car by "gliding up onto the sidewalk" 🤦🏼).

Something stood out to me one evening a couple of weeks later as I was trying to sleep in the only position I could - supine (normally, I'm a rotisserie sleeper). I was adequately comfortable while not moving. I wished silently to be able to turn on my side. And then I thought of how long it had been since I had been able to roll over - and that's when I noticed it...

The increase in suffering. It was such a subtle shift in my thoughts. One from the present (adequately comfortable) to wishing for something different (craving-induced discomfort) to that of the past many nights (intensified misery). In just a couple of seconds, I had gone from adequately comfortable to miserable without moving a muscle!

As I coached the next few weeks, I began to see others increasing their distress due to bringing the past into it. "I was thinking of all the patients I have to have this same difficult conversation with." "They continue to schedule this category of patients wrong."

What would it be like to stay in the moment - feel the discomfort of the conversation or the scheduling error and not bring the past into that moment? No other patients allowed in the room. No other patients allowed on that schedule in your mind. Keep in mind - this strategy doesn't make the discomfort disappear but keeps it from escalating unnecessarily. It also doesn't preclude you from thinking through how to put systems in place to lessen the conversations or errors.

Once I came back to the moment that night, I was like - 'yes, adequately comfortable' - and drifted off to sleep.