Near Miss Story and Reflection

Many years ago, as a second-year medical student, I stopped by the post office on my way to pathology to mail a certified letter. I had to take a different route than usual - one I knew well because it was my evening route for my study group. It was already 90 degrees with max humidity upon my arrival.

After leaving the post office and arriving at school, I jumped out and folded my seat forward to grab my backpack. And there, in the back seat, was my quiet little one in her car seat!

See, I took her to daycare every morning via one route, and in the evenings, she would stay with my husband when I went to study group. My brain was on rote memory - because I had taken the evening path to hit the post office - there was no daycare stop-off cue. Thank goodness my backpack was on the floor of the back seat! 😅

My heart has literally ached every time I see a parent convicted for leaving their infant in a hot car. It could have been me.

Neuropathways in our brains are like super-highways ("neurons that fire together wire together"). As busy physicians, we rely on automated circuitry - it's normal and sometimes highly adaptive.

This is why we should give ourselves grace when returning to a familiar pattern we're trying to change. It's so much easier to take the super-highway rather than the new footpath we're creating with only our boots in the underbrush.

Compassionately course-correct when you notice. Nothing has gone wrong -it's a process. Change and growth take time.

Reflection: What patterns are you trying to rewire? When you notice that you've gone back down a familiar pattern, how do you frame it? We know that being hard on yourself is not helpful in the rewiring process. How can you recognize that it's going to be part of the normal journey, and continue making progress?

I now have huge respect for whoever thought that new car models could give the alert "check in the back-seat." I still give a glance myself.